Humanite is a film NOT to be missed for sure. Despite being by far the worst movie I have ever seen (and I've seen a lot of losers), Humanite grasps the essence of a typical French culture, and holds on masterfully. The protagonist, Pharon de Winter, and his detective boss accurately portray police as they really are --- slow, apathetic, and ugly? The chilling touch of Pharon's mucus which hangs from his lower lip as he goes on a long bike ride throughout the country shows how the French are able to protray the grittiness of the world, a notable quality. Speaking of grittiness, the gratuitous shots of a severed part of the female anatomy (you know which) heightened the integrity of the French film makers and caused me to lean over the side of my couch to respectively vomit into a pail. Only a film like Humanite could make someone do that . . . that's for absolute sure. And only a film like Humanite could show the trouble one has when choking on an apple. I felt Pharon's pain as he emitted a hideous noise from his esophogus in his attempt to eject a chewed up piece of an apple. I felt it approximately five times. And since I'm speaking of pain, the director's display of Pharon as a lonely, weak, homosexual, and pathetic loser were captured in his attempt to play piano . . . and hum to it at the same time. Yep, there sure isn't a movie like Humanite that has all of that in it. And I guarantee that there's no movie ever made that showed a furious man (Pharon in front of the mayor's building towards the end of the film) appearing as though he just developed a thyroid condition. Yes, sir . . . Humanite has it all. Love, sex, murder, anger, disgusting shots of female anatomy, pointless conversations, bike rides, detectives, trains, cars, scenes of a person choking on an apple, scenes of a person trying his hand at piano, and of course, Pharon de Winter. After watching this movie for the first time, a rather horrible taste of bolus and something else really bad enveloped my mouth and caused me to gag. I then immediately rushed here to write this up. If you haven't seen Humanite yet, you need to . . . it will change you, that's a guarantee.

Sometimes, a book can leave you breathless. Sometimes, a book can change the way you look at everyday things. Like when, you know, you look at your hand through a kaleidoscope and think, "hey man, that sure doesn't look like MY hand." But deep down, you know it is. Sometimes, a book makes you reexamine everything you thought you knew about life. Well, this isn't one of the times. Yech. It hardly seems fair that God blinded everyone simply because they were looking at him. Seems a bit harsh. Ah well, time for a snack.

I just finished reading Self-Reliance by Emerson. It was subjected to me by my overly-enthusiastic english teacher who thought that the transcendental movement was best described via his retarded words. Well, it wasn't. It sucked. A lot. Bravo, Mr. Emerson. Yeah, I know that he thought he was changing the world when he wrote it, and that he KNEW his work was supposed to be revolutionary, yet, here we are; embittered and angry, seeking revenge. You know, it's times like these when I wish that I was illiterate. While reading this 26 page drivel, my incredibly bored and irritated brain decided to give me visions of thrusting thorns into my eyes so I could stop reading. For any of you who have to read this, please do so, I mean after all, if i had to you have to. Sincerely, Laphroaig