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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Thumbs Up from a Connoisseur
I've always prided myself on my oral abilities and often thought that I should write a book on the subject myself if I wasn't so lazy, since none seemed to be written by straight men or get beyond magazine-type tips. In short, no book elevated oral sex to art. So when I heard about this book, I was ready to hate it and dismiss it as fluff, but I read it over the weekend...
Published on July 1 2004 by jamesbernhardt7

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17 of 21 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars If your into technique only
If I was a man, and I needed to be told to flick my tongue when I'm down there, or rub it this way or that...well, maybe its me but I felt these were obvious techniques to try which your lady may or may not like. Can't a guy figure that out with each woman on his own? Isn't that half the fun? The title really has the best advice...the THINKING man.

As a woman...
Published on Oct. 28 2006 by Megan


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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Thumbs Up from a Connoisseur, July 1 2004
By 
"jamesbernhardt7" (Princeton, New Jersey) - See all my reviews
I've always prided myself on my oral abilities and often thought that I should write a book on the subject myself if I wasn't so lazy, since none seemed to be written by straight men or get beyond magazine-type tips. In short, no book elevated oral sex to art. So when I heard about this book, I was ready to hate it and dismiss it as fluff, but I read it over the weekend and it's really substantial and well-written. Dr. Kerner has put into words what I've always felt about oral sex and has even elevated it to the ranks of literature. It is written by someone who loves women and wants to show men how to translate that love into action. The book is really about much more than oral sex and the author brings a knowledge of female sexuality that is unparalleled. Every guy should read this, even if he thinks he's an expert, because it will inspire you to be even better. And not just at oral sex, but at appreciating the sophistication of female sexuality and how it's different than a man's. You'll learn things about women that you never knew before, and it's all fun and easy to read. Dr. Kerner dedicates the book to his wife, and says that in the world of mouth-music, she's his Stradivarius: priceless and precious. That comment says it all about his approach. This book isn't just about satisfying women, it's about cherishing them too and giving them true gifts of pleasure and intimacy. As Rhett Butler said, "you should be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how." This book is for any guy who has a romantic streak, or wants to be inspired to have one.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars The key to success - Knowing how to pleasure a woman, June 16 2004
By A Customer
It takes a real man to realize and openly admit he doesn't automatically know how to savor a woman's "cassolette." (Perfume box- oh, what a great term!)
This book will guide you deeply on the ins and outs you can't learn by watching porn, or talking in the locker room. For wetness sake! This book offers a cunning cunnilinguist manifesto, cites Marx, Rabelais, Kundera, Taosim, Shakespeare and Nabokov for the literary lover, has precise drawings for the curious cunnilinguist and even a cheat sheet for the harried lover. What have you to lose from reading a book on pleasuring a woman? Your innocence?
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars She comes first..., Sept. 20 2007
..then it's your turn. And so this is the premise of this very enlightning book on how to pleasure a woman. The author (Kerner) really gives good advice and isn't coy about it, either. I liked the straightforwardness language and have found this book to be useful in the bedroom. Likewise, I also enjoyed "Sex Machine"--Kane and highly recommend it as well.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Small Penis, Big on Tongue, June 30 2004
By A Customer
I heard about this book on Howard Stern this morning and had to check out the "Elvis Presley Snarl" and the "Jackson Pollack lick" and the other techniques Howard talked about. Like the King of All Media, I have a small penis, but I'm big on the tongue and am always looking to improve. I don't know if the book is good or not, but any guy who devotes himself to satisfying women and can let Howard and Artie take the piss out of him about going off too quickly and double condoms has to be okay.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Good information about female sexuality, March 21 2012
This review is from: She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman (Paperback)
The first section of the book contains good information about female sexuality. The remainder of the book is focused on performing oral sex on women. The book is worth buying for either part alone.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Underneath the Bow, June 24 2004
By 
I saw the author on the Today Show, and they wouldn't show the title of the book and made a big deal about saying the title was too sexy for tv -- it looked like they covered the book with a bow or some ribbon. The author seemed really smart and honest and young (and cute) and I couldn't imagine what was so offensive -- so I went out at lunch-time and bought it and was surprised about all the fuss. What's so bad about saying "She Comes First?" It's cute and funny...and most of all it's true, or at least it should be true! It's about time women came first, in every sense of the word. Which is why I just ordered three copies for my sister and friends. I've only read the beginning, but it seems really well written and important and the illustrations really make me want to know how to get men put a woman's pleasure first. Because just don't get it. I'm going to give it to my boyfriend with a bow on it too, but not because I don't want him to see the title, but because I want it to be the best present I ever gave him.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Funny, Informative and Thorough, July 6 2004
By A Customer
I can do nothing but praise Ian Kerner's work, She Comes First. Don't think that it's training men to be more generous out of charity. It plainly explains WHY men should make sure their partners have been given ample attention as well as HOW to do so. This book brilliantly addresses issues of safety, effective technique, variety, philosophy, biology, psychology and so on. This work is the perfect blend of humor, humility, statistically-based facts, genius insight and creativity. You can feel illuminated just by the first few chapters and still want to take more in. I know this is definitely a great read for us guys and imagine women would likely enjoy learning more about how exactly their bodies are working. Pick it up now and hope for more from this author. Enjoy.
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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars His Wife Must be the Happiest Woman in the World, July 13 2004
By 
"helenmorrisson" (Newton Massachusetts) - See all my reviews
I can't marry Ian Kerner, but I can sing the praises of his funny, honest, liberating book. I've seen him a couple of times now on the Today Show and he's always dead-on when talking about sex and what's happening in America's bedrooms. I've even emailed him anonymously with a couple of sex questions and he's been really responsive and caring. Katie Couric won't say the title of the book on TV, but she's a smart girl and I bet you she's got a copy on her bedside table. Smart women like smart guys and She Comes First really is the thinking man's guide for pleasuring woman. It's about time.
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4.0 out of 5 stars pretty good........, July 7 2004
By A Customer
the writing is fabulous, the points are well taken, that men often have a limited viewpoint about women's wants and needs...
men and women even have a limited vocabulary and working knowledge of cunnilingus, too... agreed....
ian gives us some formulas for achieving the end result. so, beyond the fabulous, self-depracating-at-times, funny, insightful, real ian, i have some issues with the content.
as a woman... i hate it when a man thinks he has a recipe for how to give me pleasure. almost inevitably i get bored. so ian gives us a recipe.
well, i guess men do like to have the directions.... and hate to ask, en route...
so i am afraid that this book would be misleading in the long run... in the short run, my partner and i may very well try out a few things, seriously modified to fit our tastes...for example, i hate flicking (too discontinuous)... but the gum press? never tried it and look forward to doing so.
thanks, ian! the world is truly better off for your contribution.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Not faking it anymore!, July 1 2004
By A Customer
I saw the author speak last night at a café in the East Village and he totally rocked! He did live sex therapy advice. It was great, because he's young and cute, not like that grandmother on the Oxygen channel. People in the audience wrote their sex questions down on index cards and then he read the questions out loud to the crowd and answered them. There were so many different questions about sex and relationships and he answered each one with expert experience and he was also very witty too and clear. As a woman who has only been able to experience orgasms through masturbation and also fakes it with her guy, I find the whole philosophy of She Comes First very exciting and liberating. I feel like I can give the book to my boyfriend and maybe he'll get the message without us having to have an uncomfortable conversation - even though Ian really talks about the importance of communication, which is a question that women kept asking about at the workshop: how to get guys to change their sexual approach without upsetting them. I really liked what Ian had to say about getting a guy to use oral sex to get a woman to the point of no return and then transitioning into the woman on top sex position and having multiple orgasms and a simultaneous one together. Reading some of the reviews, it seems like people think he's against sex, but he's really not - he's just trying to make a point about the type of stimulation women like. I'm really looking forward to not having to fake it anymore.
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She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman
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