Customer Reviews

Raising Adopted Children Revised Edition: Practical Reassuring Advice for Every Adoptive Parent

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(6)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This book has it all, including too much information on adopting the older child. There are books out there that deal specifically with this issue. This is an excellent guide for parents who are seeking international, transracial, special needs, or older child adoptions, but has little information for those adopting same-race infants "fresh from the oven," so to speak. A little too much information and a little too clinical. Reads like a textbook.

This is the first book on adoption I read, as we prepared for our adoption classes, and it will be kept in our home as a reference for many years to come. This book effectively explains adoption terms, conditions, and issues in an easy to understand and non-condescending way. It helped my husband to understand some mixed feelings I had about adoption as opposed to conception. It addresses attachment, authority, and smooth transition. My only complaint is I wish it had focused more on older adoptions instead of infant adoptions, but then, this book is more of a broad-range reference and therefore has to cover a lot of ground. A must read for anyone considering adoption!

Most of the information in this book is very helpful and thought provoking. She used research from many sources, which I found to be very helpful since there is so much to consider with adoption decisions. I can appreciate her advice on communicating to the child about adoption, and do agree with most of it; however, I disagree with the ages that she suggests to bring up certain topics. She seems to give the idea that small children are capable of understanding adult issues. Everything else is great and I would highly recommend reading this book.

As a new adoptive parent in 1980, I wanted to know what I could expect. The traditional sources of child care information were not useful to me. They talked about the importance of natural childbirth and breastfeeding to bonding and attachment, but didn't talk about how to breastfeed an adopted child or how a child not born to his parents would grow to love them. I wrote the first edition of "Raising Adopted Children" to let parents know what to expect from the time they took their child home until the time that child leaves home. This new edition of "Raising Adopted Children" reflects changes in adoption over the past 12 years, including the increase in adoptions from China and Eastern Europe and the unique issues arising from those situations. It incorporates the most recent research into various aspects of adoption, including the psychological impact of adoption, and the outcomes for children from orphanages and children who were prenatally exposed to drugs, as well as for children adopted as healthy infants. In addition to 12 more years of research, this book reflects 12 more years of personal experience. My children, just preschoolers when I wrote the first edition, are now 15 and 18. My oldest is leaving home to attend college and my youngest is beginning the quest for identity and independence. I believe I can reassure adoptive parents that the satisfaction of being an adoptive parent continues and the deep love we feel for our children grows.

Overall, I found this book quite helpful. There was some standard information, but mostly it stood out as unique and informative.

I'm only half way through this book but I think it has some really great information. My DH and I are planning to adopt but haven't officially started the process yet. This book is giving us lots of issues to think about. It provides good examples of positive language for discussing adoption with your child. The author doesn't shy away from the hard issues like racism or a history of incest. She does a great job of integrating child/teen development into all issues. She cites many studies to support her advice. The writing is rather dry (much like my own) and academic, which is actually useful. I trust this author because her writing isn't colored by a lot of emotion. She uses plenty of real-life examples from the experiences of adoptive families. The book does suffer a little from being broad and trying to address all flavors of adoption (domestic & international, same race and transracial). I highly reccomend this book to anyone considering adoption as a way to start conversations with your spouse about the hard issues you will face as adoptive parents. Might even be a good idea to share it with extended family.

This is a complete work for couples or individuals planning
to adopt children over the long term. The book provides a
guided research through the various child development stages
which include adjustment to a new family, bonding, open adoption, cultural identity and special situations.
The author describes the need to have realistic expectations.
The work is a "must read" for anyone planning to adopt
a child or multiple children. The book outlines the
typical problems encountered and various alternatives to
managing the stresses of the adoption process.

Do read this book and learn about which adoption practice is for you and what to expect about your child's emotions from infant to teen and how to handle th em. Gisela Gasper Fitzgerald, author of ADOPTION: An Open, Semi-Open or Closed Practice?

Despite the fact that Melina makes the comment, "in many respects being an adoptive parent is no different from being a biological parent," it seemed to me from the tone of the book that she doesn't believe that statement at all. While she criticizes biological parents for "minimizing" the differences between raising bio children and adopted ones, she does a 180 and interprets almost every single child-raising issue (many of which seem quite universal) as uniquely adoptive child-related (which is just as bad).

While there's a lot of useful information in this book, especially the ideas about creating meaningful scrapbooks/lifebooks for children, I found the "it's an adoption thing" tone very grating after a while.

If parents of adopted children "adopt" her tone, they're very likely to alienate everyone around them.

My wife and I both enjoyed this book. I understand it is required reading for some Adoption Agencies. We completed an international adoption in 2002, so all the parts of the book did not pertain to us. Most of the book gives good information on adoption in general, and more specific information on open adoption and international adoption. Recommended reading.