Customer Reviews

A Silent Sorrow: Pregnancy Loss-- Guidance and Support for You and Your Family

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This book was sent to me by a friend after the stillbirth of my first child. It had been recommended to her by someone who had suffered multiple pregnancy losses. I'm giving it a mixed review because although there was much that was helpful in the book, I also felt there were ways it could be improved. The best parts of the book were the chapters you could share with your spouse and parents, the chapter on dealing with family & friends (especially the practical suggestions of what to say when someone says something thoughtless to you), and the list of rituals which was an appendix in the back. One of the things I had a hard time with was that the authors try to cover so much information relating to miscarriage, stillbirth and infant death. At times I thought they focused too much on the differences between the grief process for each of these types of loss, rather than the common ground. Although there are quotes from bereaved parents throughout the book, I felt somehow that the book lacked a personal touch, it seemed very clinical, professional to me. If in your grief you want to read the first person accounts of others this isn't the book for you.

Just don't know what to do?
Hate yourself, your partner, happy pregnant women, even God?
Then you should read this book.

This book have everything you need to know after Pregnancy loss
(including termination of impaired pregnancy), Still bitrh, Newborn death.
Medical information, of course, this book will tell you how to
deal with the response of your partner, family, friends, neighbors and colleagues.

A helpful chapter "Finding solace in your religion" covers
Jewish traditions, Islamic traditions, Catholic traditions,
Protestant traditions and Mixed religions.

I heard about this book by sheer coincidence shortly after my second consecutive miscarriage five months ago. It had taken my husband and me a year to conceive after the first miscarriage, and at age 41 my chances of having another baby didn't look good. We were devastated beyond belief; while my husband dealt with his grief by withdrawing, I turned to the Internet and the library for answers. A chance casual glance at an advice column referred me to this book, which I immediately ordered from Amazon. From the moment I started reading it, I could not put the book down. I found myself continuously nodding in agreement as I saw myself on page after page. It's all there: the sense of failure, the jealousy and avoidance of pregnant women and new mothers, the anger at friends and family who didn't acknowledge our loss because they either lacked understanding or couldn't find the right words -- or both.

This book was a huge source of comfort. It helped me over the hurdle of the initial grieving stage and eventually reach an understanding and acceptance of what happened to us. I recommend this book not only to those who have suffered a pregnancy loss, but to those close to the grieving parents who want to gain a better idea of what the parents are feeling, and find the right words and actions.

...and then you should keep it and read at the holidays, at the anniversary of your loss, at the anniversary of your baby's due date, and any other time you need to understand the experience of losing a baby. If you have a friend or relative who has experienced a pregnancy loss, send her (or him) a copy of her own. No other book covers such a wide range of medical, phyical and emotional experiences that surround pregancy loss. I should know -- after the stillbirth of my first daughter, I read everything in print about pregnancy loss. I just read the recently revised edition, and was happy to see that it increased information about the kinds of losses that so many women are experiencing in this age of high-tech infertility treatments, and that Kohn and Moffitt are dead-on about the complex range of emotions women and their partners undergo. Combining deep wisdom about ageless issues of parenthood and grieving with the often terrifying new territory of high tech childbearing, this is a book that will touch many lives.

For anyone who has had the sadness to suffer the loss of a child, A SILENT SORROW is THE definitive book to own. It is not only written for the Mother and Father, but grandparents, siblings, friends and health care professionals. It's section on dealing with your loss, understanding the devastation of the grief and coping with it were instrumental in helping me deal with the loss of my daughter, who was stillborn at nine months. I read it, and reread it - sometimes daily - because it provided the comfort and support I needed. It also provides practical advice on creating services, coping with others, thinking about second pregnancies and anniversary reactions. I cannot say enough good things about this book, and would recommend it to anyone looking for a sensitive and practical insight on the sad, and often little known subject of pregnancy loss.

As a psychologist, I highly recommend this book to both mental health professionals and non-professionals. The authors address such relevant issues as grief, social isolation, ramifications on the primary relationship, and mourning in ways that inform my professional practice, while still being accessible to the general public. This book brings much needed attention to a topic, pregnancy loss, that has long been neglected. Indeed, it has proven to be a valuable resource by providing not only important information, but also cruical validation for experiences and feelings that have been minimized. A Silent Sorrow is necessary reading for care providers treating those who have experienced pregnancy loss, for friends and family of those who have had this experience, and for those who have had such an experience themselves.

This is the ultimate guidebook for those who have lost a preganacy or newborn. It offers many suggestions for rituals and support groups as well as pertinent medical information. I would suggest it to anyone in need.