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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fun and Fabulous!
This book is an excellent read for men and women alike! It uses a light-hearted approach to convey the fact that there ARE differences between men and women. In among it's many jokes are useful ideas and approaches you can use to get along better with people (men or women). I enjoyed it and my Dad enjoyed it and we're not usually reading the same genres. Together (but...
Published on Sept. 29 2005 by Rhonda Clark

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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I can't read maps? Wow, that's news to me.
I've been the navigator (a very good one) on family trips since I was ten, and I'm majoring in geology, which requires a LOT of map-reading and mental manipulation of three-dimensional objects, as well as drawing maps and blueprints of local areas/buildings from the age of 8 onwards. Golly gosh, if someone had just bothered to -tell- me that I'm incapable of doing these...
Published on Sept. 10 2003


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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fun and Fabulous!, Sept. 29 2005
By 
Rhonda Clark (SK, Canada) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
This book is an excellent read for men and women alike! It uses a light-hearted approach to convey the fact that there ARE differences between men and women. In among it's many jokes are useful ideas and approaches you can use to get along better with people (men or women). I enjoyed it and my Dad enjoyed it and we're not usually reading the same genres. Together (but separately, if you catch my drift), we've been married for over 50 years and this book was a positive influence for both of us.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Very Interesting Difference between Men and Women!, Sept. 17 2008
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
I was particularly interested in the difference on how to read maps between men and women. I hadn't recognized that before, though. Certainly, it is strange to turning the map around so often. It seems quite logical to most women to turn the map according to the direction where they are going, while men think it's ridiculous. In this case, men have better spacial skills than women, I guess. On the other hand, Allan and Barbara Pease also seemed to say that men get more distracted than women. What does it mean? According to this book, men generally hate being talked to while driving. I just wondered why men have this sort of downside in spite of their great spacial skills. At first, I thought this applied to new and/or poor drivers because they tend to be too nervous to talk while driving. However, I gradually found out that it is a matter of how to arrive faster at where they are headed for. Overall, it may be hard to judge either spacial skills outweigh concentration or vice versa.
So I wish both men and women could use well-balanced spacial skills and concentration. Therefore, they wouldn't have to waste their energies on arguments in cars.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars why do people give average review for great books?, Jan. 25 2004
By 
T SANTOSO "Creating WOW and AHA!" (Surabaya, Indonesia) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
I always am interested in How Review works. I think there is some sort of "self selection process choice" in how people review books. I often find the most best sellers books are not very well reviewed.
This is a good book, explaining the difference between how men and women see things and how genetically they are different. Allan and Barbara make a good living out of the book, it is traslated to 31 languages and sold for more than 3 million copies.
Easy to read, and fun with a lot of witty quotes. Yes, there are several repetitions throughout but any other books always bear repetitions!
It reminds me of the what Oscar to films do: Great Review, but not box office, and other Advertising Awards (great ads, no selling), I love 007 series since i was a kid, and i never understand why they never get Oscars. ;-).
So, if you want great review books, look for the great review books (you might not like it!), but if you want to enjoy reading insighful difference between men and women, get this book and enjoy it during a nice sunny weekends.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I can't read maps? Wow, that's news to me., Sept. 10 2003
By A Customer
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
I've been the navigator (a very good one) on family trips since I was ten, and I'm majoring in geology, which requires a LOT of map-reading and mental manipulation of three-dimensional objects, as well as drawing maps and blueprints of local areas/buildings from the age of 8 onwards. Golly gosh, if someone had just bothered to -tell- me that I'm incapable of doing these things, I guess so many male classmates wouldn't have come to me for help in figuring out topo maps. Just another addition to the hysterical resurgence of attempts to keep the status quo, keep women out of the sciences and allow women who aren't good at math and science to be validated in their lack of ability by designating it as simply natural and inevitable-- something they need not feel guilt over; it's all right, honey, you don't have to change because you can't. Through establishing an artificial norm of some 'natural' female sphere of ability and subtly condemning deviations from same as unnatural (who wants to be an unfeminine freak of nature?), biology rather than the Bible has become the arbiter of what women are and aren't allowed to be capable of. At the core of it all, an awful lot of the attitudes Mary Wollstonecraft railed brilliantly against in "Vindication of the Rights of Women" haven't changed at all.
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2.0 out of 5 stars Male-bashing, unreferenced tosh, Feb. 13 2004
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
I had high hopes for this book.
I was excited at finding a genuine, factual book, explaining the psychological and biological differences between the male and female brain.
I was looking forward to understanding more about the human sexes at an unbiased level.
And then I started reading it.
And I wasn't excited any more.
For something portrayed as unbiased and fact-based, it's a purley just another male-bashing book. There are three main issues I have with it:
Firstly, most sources for their information are completely unreferenced and look like they're just there to prove their point. Common phrases
are "scientist have discovered", "research has found" and "experts now know" - all useless phrases, lacking substance to anyone with more
than one brain cell.
Secondly, it constantly repeats itself over and over. Usually in the form of annoyingly large key phrases dotted around every paragraph or
so. They would be a great way to sum up what's just been said, particularly if it was a hard concept to grasp, but they don't. They more or
less repeat the last sentence word for word. A good example can be found on page 7:
"Whether men and women are _equal_ is a political or moral question, but weather they are _identical_ is a scientific one.
[Then in large italicised writing underneath:]
The equality of men and women is a political or moral issue; the essential difference is a scientific one."
... and you feel like yelling at the book, "I KNOW, YOU JUST TOLD ME, STOP INSULTING MY READING ABILITIES".
Thirdly, and most importantly, it's heavily biased towards women. If it were marketed as such, I wouldn't have a problem, but it's not. And
let me point out at this stage that I have no problems at all with poking fun at male stereotypes. But every single page begins to wear you
down. Especially when there's not fun being poked at women.It's advertised as a biological insight into our brains and why men can and cannot
do some things and why women can and cannot do other things. Seems simple, and if they'd have stuck to the plan, it would have worked.
Instead, anything where women excel (multi-tasking etc.) is rammed down our throats time after time after time. Everything where women falter
(knowing left from right) is also blamed upon the male for not understanding the woman's brain. Anything the men excel (direction) at is
sparse, but played down when it's there and anything men don't do well at is the cause of much "jocularity" and usually subject to a
derogatory cartoon.
Here's a selection of some subject headings, cartoons and (annoyinglylarge and unnecessary italicised quotes):
Page xv: A cartoon entitled "A Sunday Drive" where the dad is at the wheel of a car. His wife is next to him, looking scared and the kids are
leaning out the back window with a sign saying, "HELP! WE ARE LOST BUT OUR DAD WON'T STOP TO ASK FOR DIRECTIONS"
The text starts with a story about a family out for a drive where the dad gets angry because people are talking and he can't concentrate on
driving.
Page 4: [The first quote] How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? It's unknown, it's never happened.
Page 17: Chapter two starts with a cartoon of a man complaining he can't find the butter in the fridge.
Page 22: [Quote] Women have wider peripheral vision, men have tunnel vision.
Page 23: [Subject] Why Women's Eyes See So Much
Page 25: [Subject] Men and Ogling
Page 27: [Subject] Why Women Have A Sixth Sense
Page 29: [Subject] Why Men Can't Lie To Women
and [Subject] She Hears Better To...
Page 30: [Subject] Women Read Between the Lines
Page 31: [Subject] Why Boys Don't Listen
Page 32: [Subject] Men Miss The Details
Page 36: [Subject] Why Men Are So Thick-Skinned
Page 41: Chapter three starts with the age-old cartoon of a cross-section fo a female's and a male's brain. The male's is full of Sex,
exaggeration and "lame excuses" as well as tiny "Asking for directions microns" and one single "Hearing children in the middle of the night
neurone". Predictable, page 43 has the womens brain full of "committment" and "lie detector"
Page 47; [Quote] Tests show [uncredited] that women rate three percent higher in general intelligence than men.
Page 52: [Quote] Ask men and women if their brains work differently. Men will say they think they do, in fact there was something they were
reading on the Internet the other day... Women will say, of course they do - next question?
... and it carries on in that vein throughout. The annoying thing is, it's all true and we all know that, but why is there such a heavy
emphasis on the women's point of view?
Credit where it's due, I'm only one-third of the way through the book. If it gets better, I'll let you know.
Sadly, I have a feeling this will be my last post...
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1.0 out of 5 stars Old sexist common sense desguised in easy modern science..., Aug. 26 2003
By 
dadoo (Zürich, Switzerland) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
This book pretends to be based on scientific evidence. But we are told at the same time that this evidence would be so « politically incorrect » in a world dominated by ideologic feminism, that many scientists accepted to inform the authors on the sole condition that they remained anonymous... Strange scientists that may be so afraid of the truth(Copernic, Galileo, Darwin at their own times took more risks and were not so shy...) And poor readers that are not allowed to check by themselves the exact scope and content of studies that are supposed to definitively prove, for instance, that men are stronger as regards spatial intelligence, while women need to chat out their overwhelming emotions, hahahah (By the way, studies I am aware of are not so unanymous in identifying brain differences as regards language ability and spatial intelligence, and testosterone is not always improving performance...)
The authors' relentlessness to bring every sexual difference back to a prehistoric time where men were efficient, tunnel-sighted hunters and females wide-sighted, talkative fire-and-baby caretakers, is especially suspect. Actually, most scientists believe that animal and human genre difference relate mote to sexual selection, i.e. competition amongst males, than to natural selection, i.e. the distribution of tasks between genders optimizing the specie's chance of survival. Male oversize and agressivity is very common by mammalian species that don't hunt nor fight against predators : it has little to do will any male specialization in hunting. It is remarkable that the Peases may have missed this dimension of the story... Is it not rather that, for some mysterious reasons, male competition for females does not match in their demonstration ? In the « real » scientific world, there is even no evidence at all so far that prehistoric men hunted while their women took care of the nest... Actually, observations of hunting mammalian species suggest that, from lions to simians, females can be widely running the hunt - males preserving their energy to fight against each other for sexual prevalence.
The consequence is that it is impossible to sort out the information provided by this book : some of it is so obviously uncorrect, farfetched, misleadingly presented or oversimplified that even the rest that may be true becomes suspect.
In conclusion, the issue raised by this book is a double one :
1. What is the intention of the authors ? To pseudo-demonstrate a natural repartition of tasks and duties between genres, for instance that women are biologically deviced to stay home and raise children, leaving mathematics and car driving to men - while pretending vehemently that it is not the purpose ?
2. How could this book be so successful, and who could take it seriously ? I am especially amazed to read from other reviewers that this book has « changed their lives », and how. For this book does not bring any food for thought apart from its intentions and methodology. On the contrary, what it tells is what some people have wanted to believe for centuries. It is the quintessence of old common sense. The new thing is the systematical resort to uncheckable scientific evidence. Perhaps it's what some people what : to read that what they have always wanted to believe is the absolute truth of science. Feminism is the enemy. Backlash take all possible forms. One of them is the Peases' book. It's not the most agressive one. Nor the most subtile!
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1.0 out of 5 stars Just like Mars and Venus only different, Aug. 9 2003
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
Here we go again! I write this as a female who once again fails to fit the stereotype.
In the words of Neuro-Linguistic Programing (NLP) sometimes we have to "sort by difference." Men and woman are different, to be sure. And I think it behooves both men and women to realize this.
But in my humble opinion, this book leans more towards generalizing too much. And when I read generalizations, especially those written by educated people, I often fall into the trap of (a) expecting all members of each gender to act the same and (b) thinking that there is something wrong with me because I don't fit the stereotype and (c) feeling like I can't improve my performance on something -- like reading maps -- because genetically and hormonally, I'm not cut out to do it.
To be sure, the Peases use other examples besides "men not listening" and "women not reading maps." But I will stick to these two.
1. Even if men "naturally" don't listen, they can learn to do so, and this process is not going to lower their testosterone level. It's called GOOD MANNERS. Men are fully capable of doing this. It may take some practice, as all good skills do. But it can be done.
2. If women don't "naturally" read maps, they need to be taught how to do so. There is nothing about estrogen levels that precludes a woman from learning how to read route numbers and to learn that the top of the page is North, the bottom is south, the left is West, and the right is East. And it won't make a woman any less than a woman if she is taught how to use a compass. It can be done!
The Peases try to attempt the "nature-nurture" argument. I don't know how they would respond to what I have to say here, but I think that there is something to it. My father has a profession where he has to travel a lot, so I learned to read maps at a very early age. He is also an artist, so I learned spatial concepts early on, too. I was also exposed to domestic skills too (i.e., keeping house) and I didn't catch onto that very well!
Maybe a book like this can help men and women understand the difference in communication styles. However, I've had just as much trouble understanding the communication styles of my female friends as I have my male ones.
Maybe if we all practice common courtesy, good manners, and good teaching principles, some of these "general" differences won't be as noticeable. And then we can work on our weaknesses and not feel like we're trapped in them because of our gender.
And yet, we will still remain two wonderfully distinct genders who can understand each other just fine.
And then I can read a map and not feel guilty!
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1.0 out of 5 stars I can read a map. Is this why I didn't marry til I was 55?, Aug. 5 2003
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
Here we go again. It's Mars and Venus again, but this time with unwillingness to listen by men and inability to read maps by women. Just like it, only different!
I hate to say this, folks, but this female learned to read maps a long time ago. And I have a father who listens very well. Maybe the authors of this book would say we're "exceptions." I only know that there are a lot of exceptions out there!
My problem with this book isn't "politically incorrect" issues. I don't like stereotyping.
I'll tell you why I can read a map. I learned how. I stayed awake in my geography class and learned what north, south, east and west meant. I learned what route numbers were. I followed the routes, learned what the numbers meant, and found out that I could read it! I liked to look at the globe, and found that when a country was positioned directly above another country it was to the NORTH! (Gasp) I wonder if my estrogen count went down because of this.
I also learned spatial concepts. Why? I learned them! I was taught them! Although I'm American, I come from a long line of Dutch painters and learned three point perspective (adjusting three dimensions to a flat surface) and I learned all about volume in square feet, yards, miles -- and even cubic centimeters. Uh, oh! Another drop in estrogen? I don't know, but I sure have had fun painting pictures.
And patents? Well, how many women have had ideas that we haven't heard of? We won't know -- because they haven't been mentioned! However, many a policeman can thank a woman for inventing the bullet proof vest, many a fireman is grateful for fire excapes (invented by a female). I have also heard that the laser printer was invented by a woman.
I have my some ideas to offer here:
1. If women are less likely to mess around than men, it is because sex produces babies and the woman is the one who carries the baby around for nine months and gives birth to it. Women simply have more personal consequences. It's odd that a man is more "polygamous" but will break out in white-heat anger if the woman in his life is interested in anyone else but him.
2. If women can't read maps, parallel park or do mechanical things as well as men, teach them to do it, for crying out loud! That's probably how men learn to do oit. By the way, my best friend could parallel park like a pro, and she told me that it was because her driver ed teacher gave her an exact procedure for doing it right.
3. If men like to give advice and not take it, tell them to grow up.
4. If men don't listen, teach them how to do it. If men don't "naturally" listen, and women don't "naturally read maps (or whatever other tasks each gender is't supposed to be able to do) it does not preclude their learning how.
5. If a woman gets exasperated because her husband doesn't act like she does, or a man gets mad because his wife doesn't do things his way, then teach them that it is bad manners as well as harmful to try to make someone over. This has nothing to do with gender dynamics and everything to do with plain old common courtesy.
I believe that gender generalizations can cause a lot of harm. For many years I didn't study logic and I stopped trying to better myself mathematically because I believed that I couldn't because I was female. Imagine my surprise when I aced a college logic test!
There has got to be a better way to deal with gender differences than arbitrarily telling people that they can or cannot do something well because of hormones. Give me a break!
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3.0 out of 5 stars A fun read - don't take it too seriously!, March 16 2003
By 
David Rasquinha (Arlington, VA USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
As with any book that tries to explain the differences between men and women, this book is replete with generalizations. Once you accept that the statements made refer to probabilities that apply to the majority of subjects, but certainly not all persons, the various points start to add up. In the old genetics vs. environment debate, the Peases suggest that the hormones which govern our gender also define the pathways in which we perceive reality, pursue relationships and solve problems. Somewhat similar to the earlier 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus", this is a useful look at human behavior that might just reduce the number of male-female battles! For all the authors' claimed research however, this is just a light hearted book that can be enjoyed with profit. Do not expect any scientific breakthroughs, but you can certainly get a better understanding of both your own behavior and the mysterious behavior of the opposite sex, (whichever that may be)! Just read it with an open mind and have fun - don't take it too seriously!
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4.0 out of 5 stars Light Hearted & witty, Jan. 25 2003
This review is from: Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It (Paperback)
Stepping close to my Fav 'Men from Mars, Women from Venus, this book projects insight to behavioral patterns among men and women. The book is hilarious and thoughtful at the same time to understand relationships. The book reveals the Interrogative 'why's' like Why women are too talkative than men or why men love erotic images and women aren't impressed! There is an endless list of why's of living different worlds and the authors Allan & Barbara Pease says 'It's all in the mind' with catchy illustrations and eye opener chapter, research of the male and female brain with a simple remarkable Test to show why brain behaves as it does. The Talking & Listening Chapter reveals the fact why women dominate in speech abilities and men remain good listeners. Italic quote revelations and dialogues say a lot in a glance as one read the book Every chapter begins with a unique illustration and humor quip that's brings a cheesy smile on the face. Allan & Barbara has explained about differences that wreck way to fulfilling relationships and understanding basic urge can lead to Self awareness and improved relationship between sexes. An easy read, no detail conclusions but mere research - 'Take it as you like it' because I think its personal choice of Reading why's and everyone's experience differs altogether, any ways! The reading is pretty cool & light hearted style. However, when it comes to reading maps, well, I guess lot of women now 'CAN' & 'DO' read Maps - Women are sure different, no wonder unpredictable. A good easy going pick to pick some examples to screw fun around!
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