Top positive review
1 of 1 people found this helpful
Good but a bit outdated
on March 24, 2013
Overall I like this book. On the plus side it has a lot of interesting and pertinent questions that help a couple explore things that have never been covered before. It's a great way to get to know each other better. In my case, I am in a serious relationship with my boyfriend and wanted us to get to know each other in depth before getting a place together. Moving in together is always a big adjustment, no matter how well two people know each other so I wanted to have some of the differences that would have inevitably come out on their own, laid out on the table beforehand in order to make the experience as pleasant as possible. This book was great for learning about each other's habits and deciding how to adapt before having to go about it the hard way, by butting heads. It's a really good book for couples in similar situations, who are serious and are at a point in their relationship where they are considering taking the next step. If you're about to move in together, get engaged, get married, have a baby or just want to know if you can get serious with someone, this book is good for that. I enjoy the short anecdotal stories at the beginning of each section. They give a real life example of how a lack of knowledge of your partner on that particular issue could create problems in the relationship.
The negative sides of this book would be the introduction for one. It is excessively long and repetitive. The author goes on and on about different ways this book can be used. I already bought the book, so I didn't think it was necessary for her to try and sell me in the intro. I knew why I bought the book, so I didn't need pages and pages telling me in what situations it would be applicable. Another downside is that the book is evidently written in a different time. There is a whole page dedicated to questions about taking messages and answering machines. It seldom acknowledges the existence of cell phones, and if so it's grouped along with pagers and e-mails. Social media doesn't seem to have been invented when this book was written. Having our own cell phones and no home phone seems to make questions of that type not applicable. There is also a section on spirituality that I didn't make use of since my boyfriend and I aren't very religious. I won't bash on this section since it would be important for couples who are religious. There aren't many religious undertones in this book but it's clear enough, by the choice of questions, that the author is religious. I was disappointed with sex section of the book. A few too many questions reflected christian values for my taste and I thought some more insightful questions about sex could have been addressed, but it did still have a lot of interesting questions.
Other than that I think that the book is full of some great questions for two people to get to know each other on a deeper level. I haven't read any other question books so I can't compare it to anything, but I definitely would recommend it. If it cut down the intro from 60 to maybe 10 pages and updated the content to reflect a more modern reality then I'd definitely give this book 5 stars.