Most helpful positive review
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
A way to do "this" and not be sleazy, slick or cheesy
on August 12, 2001
It wasn't until I read this book that I felt anything positive about being in "sales". I had done it in my past and I was about to do it again and thank god for this book or I'd still be uncomfortable and tossing and turning in my sleep.
We need a new word, "sales", as this book so aptly puts it, is something you do to someone else. You "sell" them on something. Nobody wants to be sold, we all avoid salespeople and we all feel stupid selling other people on something. And those who do enjoy "selling" someone are almost always in pursuit of their own "victory", oif beating the other person into buying from them, overcoming obstacles, leaping hurdles and getting the BIG CLOSE.
They aren't really focused on the other person, an urge I sometimes fall prey to myself. Our culture makes competition and personal victories very seductive, it is what we talk about, sports teams are rarely congratulated on their effort or fine play unless they win. We view so many things as black and white, which is not natural, throughout human history you can see cooperation as a dominant and prudent way to survive and thrive, not competition (see a dense, but brilliant book on this "Nonzero : The Logic of Human Destiny" by Robert Wright). Sales is a no-win game for everyone.
Maybe there isn't any word, the "trick", the "gimmick" that this book extols is genuiness, simply being real, if you will. You meet someone, you listen, you ask some good questions so that you understand them well and what they are trying to accomplish, if you think there might be a way that you or your company can help them you offer it to them, if not, you wish them well and part graciously.
What is that? Being human? Being real? "being real" has a vaguely cheesy sound to it too, my only complaint about this book is it's title which can turn people off before they even open it. Again maybe there is no word. Many of us will simply go out and meet people and listen well and feel good about what we are doing and be personally successful as well...or are those the same thing anyway :-)
The real value of this book is some excellent exercises you can do in a meeting with someone, things to really challenge you to break out of old patterns, very, very deeply ingrained patterns.