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4.8 out of 5 stars95
4.8 out of 5 stars
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on March 5, 2004
I have read both this book and The Four Agreements several times now and each time I learn something new. After reading this book, you feel that you are completely in control of your life, and of the consequences of the choices you make. This book not only teaches you how to improve the relationships of people in your life, but, more importantly, it teaches you how to improve the relationship you have with yourself. It is well written and read very easily in a few days time. Each time I start to read this book, I don't want to put it down.
When I review a book, I usually like to at least say at least one thing that could be improved about the book. However, with this book, I can only say good things. It's well worth the money, and well worth the time to read. I have recommended it to several of my friends, telling them if it doesn't change their life, I will reimburse them for the cost of the book. So far, I haven't had to reimburse a single person!
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on July 14, 2003
Some reviewers complain that this book repeats what was written in the Four Agreements. I've read the Four Agreements as well as this book. I appreciated both in their focus on different aspects of the same concept. My suggestion is to realize what subject you're seeking advice on. I'm sure each book is written so as to be stand-alone, therefore, it will teach the same basic principles in each one.
I really like the books, and highly recommend them. It was a surprise to find that it reaffirmed my own self-discoveries. I never even heard of the Toltecs until I found these books. It makes my own personal journey toward happiness that much easier.
I think this book should be required reading for everyone. I would only change the order in which these books should be read. In school, you learn theory before you learn the practical application. My opinion is that you read the Mastery of Love first, then the Four Agreements. The Mastery of Love is the theory, how and why we should love, and what benefits derive from this love. The Four Agreements teach us guidelines in achieving this mastery of love, and any other mastery the Toltecs ascribe to. Read this book and share it with everyone.
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on August 9, 2002
I love this little book! There have only been two or three books in my entire life which have had as much practical and personal impact as this one.
It is written lucidly and directly. What is more important in this world than learning about love: love of yourself and love in all of our relationships? This isn't like most hokey-pokey "love" books out there. Mr. Ruiz cuts through the bull, the illusions, the old patterns, and really gets to the heart of what it means to have love as a powerful presence in your life. He gives analogies which are very helpful, and he doesn't just tell us what we want to hear. We are responsible for the state of our relationships. This book comes from a place of self-responsibility for the state/the dream of mature relationships.
I first read this book when I was going through a divorce. This book heals, and not just by hand-holding and patting you on the back. It comes from a place of love, so the book is kind, but like I said... it uncovers the truth. It's a quick, powerful read. When I feel like the clarity I have about my relationships is fuzzy, I return to his words. They help me to cut out the nonsense and get to the source. I feel clearer, lighter, stronger and wiser every time I pick up it up and start to consider his words. Ruiz is compassionate about his presentation. He understands where we are at and how we got here. He also has a vision for how relationships of love can be that inspires me completely and feels true.
This book is like a reverse infection. It spreads from person to person, but the infection is a healing one--medicine for our spiritual and emotional wounds. Not only did it help me let go of my divorce and heal from that pain, but when I was ready for a new relationship I noticed a marked difference in the way I related to my man, my love, after I read this book. I accepted him as he was-- beyond where I was ever able to before. I didn't take his "stuff" personally where I might have before. I also found a vast compassion for him and a greater capacity for intimacy. Yet, at the same time I became clearer and more confident about my own needs and desires. It decreased my need to control/manipulate aspects of my life or people, and opened up a world of choices. Miguel Ruiz's words changed my thinking, so I could choose my behavior in any given moment. It has improved my ability to relate and the quality of my relationships.
This is a gift: a direct result of reading this book. The Mastery of Love helped me to reshape old patterns of thinking and behavior. It didn't just fill me with information; it impacted and increased my level of consciousness. From there I was able to heal myself and act in less reactionary, more creative ways.
Get it. Read it. Pass it on. But don't try to take mine, because you could not wrestle it from me...
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for this beautiful little book.
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on February 4, 2004
The author really makes one think about the lack of self-love we have and how we have been domesticated from such an early age to shelter our true self to be what we think others want for us to be. This book was so profound for me at a time in my life, when I realized that I needed to be myself, and love myself regardless to if others loved and accepted me...this book was a real eye opener...Buy this one a re-read as is worth every penny.
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on May 29, 2004
This book, like the title says, is about the art of relationship. Don Miguel Ruiz's explanation as to how love can be is very inspiring. He also points out that it must start with love for yourself. That love is a fantastic experience, a devine experience, and not something to take for granted, to obtain through guilt, manipulation, etc. This book is relevant to all types of relationships .... friendship, spouse, children, other relatives. A very worth while read.
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on January 30, 2004
My favorite chapter was "the magical kitchen". It truly showed me in retrospect that once you TRULY love yourself you will only do what is in the best interst for your heart and soul. I was in a very dark relationship with a cruel man at the beginning of this book, and by the end I was single and also figured out how I would never allow such disrespect if I loved myself. Since this book has come into my life I love being in my own skin. I have re-read this book several times and my dating life as well as my alone time is so much more pleasureable. I have learned to love myself entirely. Don wrote this book in such a way that regardless what your situation is while reading it by the time you are finished you just feel different. You are finally seeing things with open eyes as things truly are. I reccomend this book to anyone who would like to work on themselves because this book is not how to change your man/woman it is what needs to be improved in you.
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on May 30, 2003
I rated it 3 stars because I felt they reapeated much of what they said in the 4 agreements. I felt that It should have been called apply the 4 agreements to Love instead. If you had not read the 4 agreements. I don't think you would comprehend much of this book. although the words are simple and easy to understand.
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on December 7, 2002
I just finished rereading the chapter, "The Man who didn't believe in love" I was stunned after finishing it the first time. I don't want to give the chapter away, but I am so pleased that an author can put into words, without some psycho babble, the very idea that we really need to love ourselves. Of course loving ourselves is so old and cliché, but he somehow hits the high points and brings clarity to it in just a few short pages. I have read self help books for years and this one, you will blast through in one sitting. Grab the coffee, put on your Nora Jones CD and open your mind to this fascinating book.
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on July 19, 2003
Stuck at the Las Vegas airport on January 11, 2002 I bought this book at the store there. Alone in a crowd of people it was the perfect book. I spent hours reading this book and finished it on the plane home (it was a long layover in Vegas). I was in the midst of finishing my 400 page book CUTTING THE CORD: GUIDE TO GOING WIRELESS and I thought I was losing touch with my heard by living too much in my head so it seemed like the perfect antidote. This is one of the dozen or so books I keep in my bedroom and reread -- verus books that are in my office. Even if you don't believe in love anymore, you'll find out more about yourself by reading this tome. Spiritual? Yes, but practical too -- by appealing to your analytical side, Ruiz somehow touches your soul. A great section on healing the emotional body is a lifelong guide to dealing with hurts and owning your own power. You don't have to read THE FOUR AGREEMENTS (also by this author) to value from this book but you might want to since it is a very wise book also. We don't have to learn about love the author maintains-- everything we know about love is in our GENES -- somehow that is quite comforting because the current literature and pop psychologists always say that we must learn, re-learn or modify ourselves, jump through hoops or twiste ourselves into pretzels to find the love we want.
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on January 21, 2003
This is a beautiful and gentle book about experiencing the great being that
you really are. In the course of this self-discovery, Ruiz points out that
we need to become aware of how trained our minds have become to suffering.
Once we recognize where we are using our minds to diminish our sense of
well-being, we have a choice in letting go of destructive behaviors.
I particularly enjoyed the chapter called, "The Dream Master." Ruiz
describes our life as a dream. Before we learn to master this dream, we
live in a Dream of Fear that enslaves us in a perpetual cycle of suffering.
To master the dream, we must begin with ourselves - we must be completely
honest with ourselves. When we tell ourselves the truth about what we like
and dislike in our circumstances, we have a choice to follow those things
that feed our happiness and to let go of those things that put us in pain.
As we discover how to see things as they are without getting lost in our
reactions and our minds' interpretations of what we see, we become Dream
Masters. Through awareness of our experience of life, we recover our free
will: "Becoming aware is about being responsible for your own life."
In my own experience, I have found awareness to be an inexplicably powerful
tool for living fully and passionately. An excellent book that nurtures
one's ability to live with awareness is "Working on Yourself Doesn't Work"
by Ariel and Shya Kane. The authors' presence in this book is clear,
compassionate, and truly compelling. I recommend it as an excellent
companion to Ruiz's book and wish you well in your self-discovery.
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