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5.0 out of 5 stars Good Cult Comedy Sci-Fi Flick, Bad Visual Quality
I don't care what anyone else says, but for the goofy script and tongue-in-cheek comedy I think Bill Sachs is a genious. The film quality copy process, however, leaves much to be desired, through no fault of Mr. Sachs. Whoever the slobs were who basically did nothing but show their unprofessional attitude with this DVD release should be defrocked and locked in a cage...
Published on Sept. 23 2001 by Prairie Bear

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1.0 out of 5 stars shockingly awful
There's nothing more awful than a comedy that isn't funny. Apparently the folks who made Galaxina were going for a kind of space-movie parody with sex, but there is exactly ONE funny bit in the movie. The bikers on the distant planet who worship Harley Davidson by bowing down to a motorcycle and going "Vroom! Vroom!" That's it. It lasts about 10 seconds, and pfft, end...
Published on Aug. 11 2003 by happydogpotatohead


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1.0 out of 5 stars shockingly awful, Aug. 11 2003
This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
There's nothing more awful than a comedy that isn't funny. Apparently the folks who made Galaxina were going for a kind of space-movie parody with sex, but there is exactly ONE funny bit in the movie. The bikers on the distant planet who worship Harley Davidson by bowing down to a motorcycle and going "Vroom! Vroom!" That's it. It lasts about 10 seconds, and pfft, end of funny. Quite honestly, has there EVER been a funny space-movie parody besides "Galaxy Quest?" Ever? Nope. And this one isn't either. The jokes are so bad, and so labored, and take so long to arrive, and are delivered so badly, that it's agonizing.
The sex part? THERE ISN'T ANY. Not unless you count the scene in the space bordello, which is neither sexy nor funny. So the movie fails on both counts; it's not funny, and it's not sexy. It just sort of flops around from disconnected scene to disconnected scene. All the guys in the movie are slimy cheeseballs with open shirts and ASCOTS. And then there's Avery Schreiber. Avery Schreiber. Who told this guy he was funny? Can we sue them? Was he funny? Ever?
And what was this movie shot on? I mean, the whole film is blurry. It's out of focus all the way through. I've seen MP3's with better image resolution than this movie.
The only thing that might make this dreadful failure worth watching at all, for even five seconds, is Dorothy Stratton. Poor Dorothy. She can't act, of course, but she is beautiful, even in the sublimely stupid outfits they put her in here. And she goes through this thing like a trooper, doing exactly what she's supposed to, which is act like a robot.
Trust me, this movie's not even good no matter how many of whatever substances you imbibe. It's too awful to even make fun of. It's just plain awful. Unless you are absolutely obsessed with Dorothy Stratton or you have some weird need to collect every bad science fiction movie ever made, avoid this like the plague.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Bad Bad Movie, Not Good Bad, April 17 2003
This review is from: Galaxina (VHS Tape)
I love Dorothy Stratten. She was the first Playmate I ever saw and she was the most incredible vision I'd ever seen. I love Science Fiction. I grew up with it and I've read and seen just about everything ever released. I love good bad movies. The first time I saw Deathrace 2000, I couldn't stop laughing. Toxie is a personal hero of mine. I live for Friday night to watch good bad movies and munch on popcorn.
I only mention all of the above to preface my review because they're important. I'm exactly the intended target audience for this movie.
It's bad. Really bad. Bad bad. Using terms like "witty" and "humorous" are completely out of place with this movie. I had a friend in grade school who made witty movies. This isn't even close.
My first impression was incredibly poor. The A G O N I Z I N G L Y slow pan along the length of the spaceship while music that sounded like it was lifted from a Bugs Bunny cartoon in a more serious moment seemed like it would never end. And then it went downhill.
There is no sense of sequence to the story. It's a hodge-podge of scenes that seem to have been written by someone determined to see how bad a movie could be and still be funded and released by a theater. Well, now we know.
The acting is beyond cardboard, the supposed "parody" simply a matter of trying to reference other movies everyone would know without realizing you need to do something clever with it to be funny, and throughout all of this is the maddening Bugs Bunny classical soundtrack.
Don't waste your time... even if you think it would be worth trying to see how bad it is. That's why I saw it. I've seen thousands of movies, and this is my first movie review. That should tell you how bad this movie must be.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Good Cult Comedy Sci-Fi Flick, Bad Visual Quality, Sept. 23 2001
By 
Prairie Bear (Forks, WA United States) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
I don't care what anyone else says, but for the goofy script and tongue-in-cheek comedy I think Bill Sachs is a genious. The film quality copy process, however, leaves much to be desired, through no fault of Mr. Sachs. Whoever the slobs were who basically did nothing but show their unprofessional attitude with this DVD release should be defrocked and locked in a cage for future film editors and scientists to study.
I've always been a cult comedy and sci-fi movie buff, and this has some hilarious scenes, including the colony of space bikers who worship their Lord, "Ha-Ley David San AH-OOM, AH-OOM." Rock Eater utters his famous insult at the Captain, and don't forget THE BLUE STAR aaaahhhhhhhhhh! Galaxina is always calm, cool, shockingly electric in more than just design, and of course there are the typical crew of space cowboys with one who wants to be more than a crewmate with Galaxina, just to mix it up with the hero/heroine approach. I think the director did a wonderful job at corny comedy sci-fi, and I hope in the future a better release film-quality-wise is produced than what is currently on the market.
Oh my aching gyros....!
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3.0 out of 5 stars A bit cheesy, July 27 2002
By 
David FERNANDEZ SABIO (Torrejón de Ardoz, Madrid Spain) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
Well we have here a sorts of galactic adventures started in the final and first 80's.
Galaxina(Dorothy R Stratten) is a female robot which leds in the Eternity Police starship.
The crew including a cowboy a shaggy beared captain,a black vampire(or cousin of Mr Spock the vulcanian) and a japanese old man.
They get a mission got to a remote planet to get the Blue Star(ahhh!) from a alien robot which lives in a west town style full of aliens.
Of course they sent Galaxina to get the treasure.
After she is captured by a band of Harley Davidson believers they rescued her and returns to the ship.
The dialogue is a bit cheesy the humour and jokes are very obvius and the intents of Galaxina of talk are evident.
The presence of playmate DRS at least worth the money.
The sound is clear and audible,but the image clarity is poor,it seems that the transfer was done from an old vhs tape.
They should make a better image quality.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Dorothy Stratten deserves better., June 20 2000
This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
I really LIKE this film. But Rhino has done it a real disservice with this pitiful release on DVD. It is NOT, as was advertised here, in widescreen format. The print used is terrible, and you can even see the telecine operator adjusting (squeezing) the image to get the crawling text (Star Wars style) on screen during the opening sequence WHILE THE FILM IS RUNNING! The "hilarious Easter Egg" computer animation is just plain stupid, and the Andy Kaufman soundtrack over the "previews" is simply annoying after the first time. I only purchased this DVD to finally get the Widescreen version of this movie, and I am terribly disappointed in the product. Now that the movie is out on DVD, I suspect there's little hope of a remastered widescreen version anytime soon.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Example of how not to produce a DVD!, Dec 14 2000
By A Customer
This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
Being a "D" collector and owning Galaxina on laser disc I was greatly excited to hear that a DVD was coming out in widescreen. I must admit to great shock at finding out that the print they used for this DVD seems to be the exact one used in the laser disc. It is not even Pan and Scan. It is just tunnel/zoom vision. The techs just took the middle of the film and zoomed in until it filled the T.V. screen! No interest or care seems to have been taken to find the original print and remaster it. The only saving grace is the angelic presence of Dorothy Stratten. She was heavenly beauty descended. Her best film presence was in the movie "They all laughed" which I really wish Bogdanovich would remaster and release on DVD. Get this DVD only for "D".
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3.0 out of 5 stars Galaxina on DVD, June 3 2000
By A Customer
This review is from: Galaxina (VHS Tape)
The film transfer to DVD is Good. I had wished it to be in widescreen, but it is in Pan & Scan. The special features are Star Bios, A short Slide Show, The original trailer and a not so hidden Easter Egg.
I still can't figure out if this is a B film on it's own. Or a campy parody of a B movie. Anyway the corny humor still works as the movie makes its point. Definitely is to space movies, what Spinal tap is to Rock & Roll movies.
I always loved the soundtrack to this movie, Great Classical Score and a romping Rock & Roll number mid way.
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3.0 out of 5 stars A disappointing sci-fi flick., March 27 2001
By 
Peter Beamer (Grover Beach, CA USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Galaxina (VHS Tape)
Dorothy R. Stratton (the R stands for Ruth) is Galaxina. She is a beautiful robot of sorts. She basically runs the spacecraft. She is electrified so she can't be touched. What isn't immediately known is her ability to adjust her ZAPPING tendencies. She also teaches herself to talk. It turns out she is pretty smart too. Outwits a real alien, learns how to kick-start a Harly Davidson, she even falls in love. Knows how she can have children (it's in the catalog). She was brutally murdered at the age of twenty.
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3.0 out of 5 stars Oh well, Jan. 9 2001
By 
Brandon Sachs (Santa Monica, CA USA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
My dad made this movie. And I've never seen a good quality version of it. We have a lot of old tapes but they are terrible pan and scan and in some parts the entire panavision is squeezed onto the screen so everyone looks really tall and thin. We were eqcited to hear of the DVD and were terrified to find it's made from the same bad print. We know of people who have it on film and high quality versions do exist. It's sad the DVD is so bad though.
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4.0 out of 5 stars OOOO WAH!!, Oct. 16 2002
This review is from: Galaxina (DVD)
Galaxina is one of those movies that you either like, or hate. No in between. It has a lot of adult humor, and adult language, and is a bit off kilter!
As to this DVD version: I like it a lot better than the tape. Much crisper, clearer picture and audio. I wish there were more added features, but with the star's demise, I guess a lot was lost.
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Galaxina
Galaxina by William Sachs (DVD - 2006)
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