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Apron Anxiety: My Messy Affairs In and Out of the Kitchen Paperback – May 22 2012

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Three Rivers Press (May 22 2012)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0307952142
  • ISBN-13: 978-0307952141
  • Product Dimensions: 13.2 x 1.6 x 20.3 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 204 g
  • Average Customer Review: Be the first to review this item
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #645,339 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product Description


“Hot sex, looking good, scoring journalistic triumphs . . . nothing made Alyssa love herself enough until she learned to cook. There's a racy plot and a surprising moral in this intimate and delicious book.”
—GAEL GREENE, creator of and author of Insatiable: Tales from a Life of Delicious Excess

“I loved this book. It’s partly a cautionary tale about getting involved with young career-driven men and a love story about a woman and the city she loves and leaves and loves again. And finally, it’s about good friends, a loving family, and the importance and good fortune Alyssa has for having both. Oh, and there’s a great recipe for mac and cheese.”
—JOHN DELUCIE, chef/proprietor The Lion, Crown restaurants, and author of The Hunger: A Memoir of an Accidental Chef
“Part memoir, part cookbook, Alyssa’s writing is honest, witty, and disarming—a compelling journey of a girl becoming her own woman. Though she experiences love and loss, she finds her sweetest days where she least expects it—within herself in the kitchen. With that, Alyssa encourages even the most kitchen phobic to turn on the oven.” 
—DANYELLE FREEMAN, founder of and author of Try This: Traveling the Globe Without Leaving the Table

“Shelasky's memoir is a zesty read about dating, family, and self-discovery.”

"Amusing, compassionate story of love among the pots and pans."

“Shelasky’s energetic memoir looks at her experiences as celebrity journalist turned food blogger and the relationships that sparked her passion for cooking… Shelasky is candid about her misadventures and, in a charming touch, includes related recipes at the close of each chapter.”

“Alyssa Shelasky’s unpretentious prose leaves us hungry for more.” DAILY CANDY

“Here’s your summer racy read with plenty of juicy gossip to keep a foodie’s interest.”

About the Author

ALYSSA SHELASKY is the New York editor of Grub Street at New York magazine, as well as the creator of the blog Apron Anxiety ( She has written for numerous publications including People, Us Weekly, Hamptons Style, Gotham, Self, Blackbook, TV Guide, The New York Post, New York magazine, CBS's Watch magazine, and Glamour magazine.

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) 3.8 out of 5 stars 112 reviews
158 of 172 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Self-absorption at its finest. May 31 2012
By GadgetChick - Published on
Format: Paperback
So, I have to start out by saying that my disappointment with this book is largely my own fault. For whatever reason, I keep picking up books by privileged rich girls from New York City, who have inexplicably decided that their lives are so fascinating that they need to write 300 pages about their plucky adventures navigating romance/career/drugs/whatever in the "Big City." I find the authors self-absorbed, whiny, and boring. Their lives are not interesting. They have nothing profound to say. Why do I keep reading their books, then? I don't know. But after reading Shelasky's book, I can finally say - I think I'm done.

I never read Shelasky's blog, Apron Anxiety, or Grub Street before picking up this book, so I had to go do some background reading before I wrote this review. I think I am even more baffled than before. Both the blog, and the fluffy bits of foodie writing, are far from what I would call enduring works of literary importance, but Shelasky talks in the book like what she does is akin to documenting the atrocities of Cambodian genocide. I also had to look up some pictures of Shelasky herself, because from the descriptions of herself she coyly gives in the book, I was expecting some goddess; a Venus who has men dropping at her feet to worship her and beg for crumbs from her table. Let's just say her pictures don't really help me understand the book either, and leave it at that.

Here's Apron Anxiety in a nutshell: overprivileged, overbored, overconfident die-hard NYC party girl bounces around meeting celebrities as a gossip reporter (and you'll get to find out about EVERY celebrity she ever talked to, because she puts their names in the book). Then she engineers a meeting with a chef from a reality show she thinks is cute, and they end up going out. For some reason she doesn't put his name in the book, even though it takes a two-second Google search to find out who it is (Spike Mendelsohn from Top Chef, who wore those little hats and was kind of a jerk to everyone in his season). They have a whirlwind romance, he sweeps her off her feet, he takes her to Greece and they eat some kind of seawater-bread salad by the ocean. Then, inexplicably, after three months of dating she quits her job at People Magazine (and I imagine they don't just hand those out to folks who come knocking), moves to Washington, D.C. to be with Mendelsohn, who is knocking his brains out opening restaurants there, and then promptly decides she hates everything about Washington and she hates her life and everything sucks because - THROUGH HER OWN ACTIONS - she has nothing to do all day but decorate their apartment and wait for him to come home from work.

See, this is what I don't get. Although I definitely think Shelasky's self-evaluation of her own hotness, talent, brilliance and irresistability is, shall we say, a little overblown? She doesn't seem stupid. But even people who haven't been raised by loving parents, with every advantage and opportunity, usually can figure out that quitting a great job to follow a guy who works 80 hours a week, and then not getting a job or finding something to do with your time, is a recipe for trouble.

And trouble follows. Saying that Shelasky seems a little high-maintenance is like saying that the contestants on Top Chef are a generally a little ambitious. She yells, she screams, she cries in public, she picks fights, she berates Mendelsohn on the phone in stairwells outside ritzy fundraising events. She emails pictures of herself and Mendelsohn to gossip blogs and magazines from an anonymous email account, and gets busted doing it. She says snarky things about how out-of-shape and "unwaxed" the women at her spinning gym are. She seems to expect Mendelsohn or her Mommy and Daddy or someone to come along make things all better for her, when it's her own choices that have caused 99.9% of her problems, and therefore, her own choices are the only things that can fix her life. For some reason, in the midst of all this madness, Shelasky and Mendelsohn get engaged, and Shelasky immediately starts planning a wedding it is very obvious that Mendelsohn is not into going through with(and for good reason). She becomes a grasping, needy, screeching harpy and proceeds to make Mendelsohn's life miserable. I ended up feeling incredibly sorry for Spike as I was reading the book. In his shoes, I would have spent as much time as possible away from Shelasky too. Any time a guy is saying things like "Don't scream at me, OK?" or repeating to himself and to you "I am a good person" (which Alyssa answers with an oh-so-sensitive "you need to SHOW me, not just SAY it"), he is a guy being emotionally beaten to death by his girlfriend. I was glad when we got to the "horrible breakup" part of the book because I was rooting for Mendelsohn to get the heck away from this psycho who was making his life miserable! And through it all, I keep having this sneaking suspicion that Shelasky was hanging on so tough because she had either envisioned Spike getting rich and "taking her away from it all," or she was envisioning that his success and fame would rub off on her and they would be some kind of fabulously rich, fabulously famous, fabulous couple, without her having to rely on her own talent, or do much of anything.

Somewhere in the course of all this canoodling and jetting off to food shows and screaming and breaking up, ad nauseum, she decides to teach herself to cook because she needs something to do. Then she starts a blog about it. I guess she hadn't heard about the whole Julie/Julia project thing, right? Because it's been done, but somehow, according to her, Shelasky's blog is some kind of life-changing paean to newfound domesticity. Eventually, she and Mendelsohn break up and she gets a job at New York Magazine writing about food. She dates a few more guys and dumps them unceremoniously, I'm not sure why those stories even made it into the book as they were boring, and irrelevant. Plucky City Girl Triumphs Over Bad Relationship to Find Semi-Fame and Somewhat Fortune, and Gets a Book Deal. Yay.

Like I said, my disappointment with the book is largely my own fault. I need to stop reading books like this, because it makes me A. fear greatly for the future of womanhood in our society, and B. get irrationally angry at the people who keep giving book deals to people like this, and denying them to good writers who actually have something to say. I imagine that the problem is that so many book people in New York are themselves shallow, snotty, overconfident women (or men), and so when books like this land on their desk, they can relate and think other people will (of course!) be able to as well. But there is absolutely nothing profound about Shelasky's life, and therefore there is absolutely nothing profound about this book. She writes as if her relationship with Mendelsohn was some kind of Taylor-Burton "love for the ages," but in fact, it was absolutely no different from the passionate-but-ill-advised love affair most women have in their twenties or thirties. You love, you learn, you move on. Shelasky is a good writer, but why anyone felt her brief life and mediocre adventures deserved a book-length navel-gazing exploration, I don't understand.

Anyway. If you like snark and fluff? This book has snark and fluff. Fuhgeddaboutit. It might be a good vacay read. But substance and meaningful content and relatable experiences and humility are greatly - and I mean GREATLY - lacking. So if that would bother you, skip it. I wish I had.
34 of 44 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Probably one of the worst books I have ever tried to read Aug. 6 2012
By M. Monaco - Published on
Format: Paperback
My husband bought me this book as I love books about food and books about people who love food. I must confess I did not finish this book, but I gave it a good try (90+ pages.) She starts off telling us about her fun and quirky family and then it all goes down from there. THe author is so self-absorbed, so full of herself, it's really a bit stunning. She is truly an unlikeable person and it's hard to root for someone who is so unpleasant. Her treatment of Gary (5 year relationship) is terrible...but it turns out he just wasn't inspiring enough for her and she decides she will only date men who inspire her. In NYC she met men absolutely everywhere. In Washington, no one notices her and she is stunned that men in the nation's capital aren't falling all over themselves to get to her. From the photo on the back of her book, she looks like an attractive woman, but she is no stunner. The way she talks about herself, you image she must be cover model material. SPOILER! I flipped to the back of the book...wanting to know if somehow she'd revealed some healthy introspection by the end of the story. Nope! It's no surprise that the author is still single. She is way too picky and annoying. While she tells us that she's ended most of these relationships, it's impossible not to wonder if that's really true. This book was so terrible that I'm convinced that all the 5 star ratings are ratings by the author herself or friends. (Positive note: she obviously is a skilled writer. She's worked as a professional writer and editor and it shows. Unfortunately, she decided to write a tedious memoir instead of a clever work of fiction.)
28 of 36 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars The author doth protest too much Aug. 1 2012
By Dandelion - Published on
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
The author spends a lot of time describing her incredible talents, her good looks, her ability to attract any man, and her amazing friends & family - to a nauseating degree. At first I couldn't decide if the author was narcissistic or extremely insecure but I'm going to go with the latter because who else would incessantly call/text/email their boyfriend for reassurance, knowing that he was incredibly busy opening a restaurant. (I would love to hear Spike's side).

I cringed through most of this book and kept waiting for the point where she gained some self-awareness.
18 of 24 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I hope she doesn't try to make a movie out of this Sept. 26 2012
By Raquel - Published on
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I really wish I'd read the reviews before I ponied up the ten dollars for this piece of garbage. My feeling after reading it is not unlike that of wasting 1,000 calories on a crappy muffin.

I love food memoirs -- I seek them out, but this isn't a memoir worthy of publishing. This should have been sold as a summary of her relationship with a TV chef and how she learned to cook because of it. That's all it was: a summary. There were no sordid, fun details that you might have hoped for based on the title. The whole thing seemed a bit narcissistic, frankly. Case in point: "Some people would call me a hot girl. Others would call me a hot mess. I consider myself something in between." Barf.

If you're into food memoirs, SKIP IT. If you're into reading, AVOID IT LIKE THE PLAGUE.
I was unimpressed enough to not want to read her blog. She's impressed with herself enough for both of us anyway.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Blog-esque fluff from an amateur, sometimes entertaining July 17 2013
By Beth Wade - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition
Apron Anxiety: My Messy Affairs In and Out of the Kitchen is exactly what is sets out to be: a memoir from a 30-something blogger who was inspired to cook and bake as a means of empowering herself when her personal relationship went down the tubes.

It's a little awkward for me to read a memoir of someone about my age, both in terms of "why can't I relate to this person who is my peer" and also "I'm 31 and I apparently have done nothing with my life". But once I got past both of those, I found it to be an enjoyable airplane/quick read. Yes, Alyssa is self-absorbed, shallow, and apparently wealthier than I'll ever be, but she doesn't promote the book as anything other than snark and fluff, which it is.

The book reads quickly and entertainingly, although shifts tense and is definitely in the narcissistic born-of-a-blog style (ala Julie and Julia). Alyssa and I have virtually nothing in common, but she is as honest as, I suppose, she can be given her biased first-person perspective. And I like that she doesn't gloss over the fact that she had learning and growing to do in her twenties and thirties.

Although Alyssa came to food unconventionally, it's clear that she found comfort and empowerment in preparing it, as so many of us foodies do. Although, now I hesitate to use the word, considering the negative connotation she associates with it (apparently, in New York, snobster gastronomers in the "food scene" who are rude use the term...and here I thought it just meant "someone who enjoys culinary adventures"). It wasn't a deep read, or an eye-opening one, just the casual story of one gal's relationship and food messes and how she became (sort of) her own person.

I recommend this book for fans of blogger success stories, coming-of-age true life stories, young person memoirs, an interesting perspective on East Coast life, and fans of self-aware comedy writing. Also, if you want a quick and easy read.