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Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum Paperback – Oct. 26 2021
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Jennifer exposes the constant struggle between carefully crafted persona and authentic existence, editing the autism script with wit, candor, passion, and power. Her journey is one of reverse-self-discovery not only as an Aspie but--more importantly--as a thoroughly modern woman.
Beyond being a memoir, Autism in Heels is a love letter to all women. It’s a conversation starter. A game changer. And a firsthand account of what it is to walk in Jennifer's shoes (especially those iconic red stilettos).
Whether it's bad perms or body image, sexuality or self-esteem, Jennifer's is as much a human journey as one on the spectrum. Because autism "looks a bit different in pink," most girls and women who fit the profile are not identified, facing years of avoidable anxiety, eating disorders, volatile relationships, self-harm, and stunted independence. Jennifer has been there, too. Autism in Heels takes that message to the mainstream.
From her own struggles and self-discovery, she has built an empire of empowerment, inspiring women the world over to realize they aren't mistakes. They are misunderstood miracles.
- Print length288 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherSkyhorse
- Publication dateOct. 26 2021
- Dimensions15.24 x 1.83 x 22.86 cm
- ISBN-101510758690
- ISBN-13978-1510758698
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Review
“I am blown away. Never has a book on autism captured the female perspective with so much accuracy, grit, and flair. The perspective of the girl who models herself after typical girls but never quite fits in, and feels fraudulent, is a common but never before clearly articulated phenomenon for women with autism. Jennifer’s stories will resonate with women on the spectrum and women everywhere trying to find their identities and find their way navigating their life journeys. I literally could not put this book down and would recommend it to all women, those on and off the spectrum, and the men who want to better understand them. —Wendy Ross, MD, CNN Hero, Autism Society of America Person of the Year, founder of Autism Inclusion Resources
“Witty, frank, and full of insight, Jennifer O’Toole’s Autism in Heels is a major addition to a growing body of literature on the distinctive experience of women on the autism spectrum, long overlooked by researchers and clinicians. After helping to pioneer the genre with her groundbreaking Sisterhood of the Spectrum, O’Toole takes us deep into her often harrowing process of becoming self-aware in a world built for non-autistics, guiding us through her search for meaning and identity in a voice that is disarmingly candid, appealingly warm, and often hilariously funny. O’Toole is a natural storyteller. Autism in Heels is a great book.” —Steve Silberman, author of NeuroTribes: The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity, winner of the Samuel Johnson Prize for Nonfiction
“I have always considered Jennifer an Aspie mentor in terms of her insights and wisdom on life as experienced by a woman who has autism. She is a natural talent who, in Autism in Heels, has indeed written a love letter to all women. Her memoir will change our perception of autism and how those with autism will perceive themselves.” —Tony Attwood, PhD, bestselling author, international speaker
“Funny, moving, compelling, deep . . . Autism in Heels is an absolute must-read not only for women on the spectrum, or people who love them, but anyone who likes a good conversation with an utterly brilliant mind.”“ —Maia Szavalitz, bestselling author and award-winning journalist covering neuroscience and addiction for Time, Scientific American, and more
“Jennifer O’Toole allows us to witness the workings of her beautiful, brilliant mind, to share in her vulnerability, and to be thoroughly entertained by her storytelling. Through both her content and style we get a glimpse of the intense empathy and passion that is so often misunderstood about autism, and in particular, about the unique experience of women on the spectrum. Ultimately this is a book for everyone. —Jed Baker, PhD, bestselling author, international speaker
“Autism in Heels is a compelling must-read that proves autism doesn’t have a set appearance. Witty and full of real-life experience, readers will love O’Toole’s writing. She inspires hope, individuality, and certainty for those of us on the spectrum that we are not limited by our uniqueness. We really can do anything we set our minds to.” —Rachel Barcellona, autism self-advocate, Miss Southeast International, Unicorn Children’s Foundation Ambassador
“Autism in Heels hit me to the core. Exposing the pain of perfectionism, anorexia, bullying, abuse, and loneliness, Jennifer outlines the sheer need for this memoir in exposing the vulnerability that many girls face from being gifted, talented, and on the autism spectrum. This is an incredible, necessary book that will change lives for the better.” —Barb Cook, editor and author of Spectrum Women, founder and editor in chief at Spectrum Women Magazine
“Told like no other, this book leaves all of us, autistic or not, better human beings for having known Jennifer O’Toole.” —Sharon Lee Cummings, copublisher/editor at large of Zoom Autism Magazine, Autism Society of Virginia board member
“I was immediately captivated by Jennifer’s intimate story telling. Autism in Heels is a story of honesty and empowerment, and is a must read for women with and without autism.” —Michelle Dean, assistant professor of special education at California State University, Channel Islands, technical consultant for the Netflix/Sony show Atypical
“Autism in Heels is a fascinating glimpse into the mind of an autistic woman. It’s a must-read for anyone without autism to learn a new side of tolerance and inclusion. And for my fellow autistic women, you’ll hopefully find parts of her life that parallel your own, as I did, and know you are not alone.” —Carly Fulgham, Autism Society of California board member, Art of Autism board member
“Honest, raw, intimate. Jennifer O’Toole’s description of the female autistic life experience will resonate with many generatons of autistic women to come. —Christa Holmans, autistic author and advocate, Neurodivergent Rebel Blog
“Jennifer O’Toole spares nothing of her experiences and methodically dissects the internal and external realities of what it’s really like to be an Aspie female. I urgently recommend this book to clinicians, parents, self-identified, self-curious humans. Reading it will increase your knowledge, your sensitivity, your worldview, and your love.” —Carol Moog, PhD., clinical psychologist and co-author of The Autism Playbook for Teens”
“An essential read that I cannot wait to share. Writing with a radiating kind of aliveness and breathless honesty, O’Toole tackles all the tough issues—trauma, eating disorders, self-harm, depression, self-doubt—alongside the grace, hope, and joy of a life lived full of meaning and self-discovery.” —Shana Nichols, PhD, clinical psychologist specializing in female ASD, lead author of Girls Growing Up on the Autism Spectrum
“Thanks to Jennifer O’Toole, we have established a sturdy, hard-won narrative tradition that has the power to change hearts and minds.” —Valerie Paradiz, PhD., Autism Speaks board member; Director, National Autism Leadership Institute
“Jennifer O’Toole systematically examines issues faced by this group and illustrates with examples from her own journey. . . . Although Jennifer accentuates the positives, she does not sugarcoat vulnerabilities, dangers, and despair that women on the spectrum are likely to face. Her powerfully punching wit and insight are of a beauty and efficacy that only a spectrum mind could imagine.” —Lars Perner, PhD, Autism Society of America executive board member
“This slice of life on the spectrum illustrates just how diverse our lives can be, and how different our inner realities may be from what observers assume.” —John Elder Robison, bestselling author, advisor to the US Department of Health and Human Services, World Health Organization Autism Advisor, Institute for Autism Research co-chair
“Brave, warm, and fiercely honest, Jennifer has broken the autism mold open with her riveting story. From anxiety and eating disorders to relationships and self-doubt, Autism in Heels will provide invaluable relief for girls and women around the world who have too-long struggled to fit in. A jewel of a book!” —Susan Stifleman, PhD., bestselling author, Huffington Post columnist, Today Show contributor
“In this chipper memoir–cum–inspirational guide . . . O’Toole’s compassion and enthusiasm are infectious.” —Publisher’s Weekly
About the Author
Product details
- Publisher : Skyhorse
- Publication date : Oct. 26 2021
- Language : English
- Print length : 288 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1510758690
- ISBN-13 : 978-1510758698
- Item weight : 354 g
- Dimensions : 15.24 x 1.83 x 22.86 cm
- Best Sellers Rank: #67,309 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #13 in Disability Biographies
- #19 in Children & Adolescent's Autism Spectrum
- #263 in Neurology (Books)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author

Links You Want to Keep Handy:
*JENNIFER O'TOOLE, AUTHOR: www.JenniferOTooleAuthor.com
*ASPERKIDS, Jennifer's Cache of Instant Downloads, Common Sense Ideas.., & Awesomeness:
www.Asperkids.com
*WIKIPEDIA:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jennifer_Cook_O%27Toole
**Social Media
*Speaking Geek YOUTUBE series: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLEYKhD09OsuBRB7ScqJ1g-ho2sym7pQWN
* Speaking Geek (audio) PODCAST on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/speaking-geek/id1021015570?mt=2
*FACEBOOK: www.Facebook.com/Asperkids
*TWITTER: www.twitter.com/Asperkids
Smart. Lively. Cheeky. A global conversation-starter with a doppleganger Sesame Street muppet. That’s Jennifer O’Toole, author of the "Asperkids" series and “Sisterhood of the Spectrum,” the award-winning, best-selling autism-related book collection in the world, and the highly-anticipated “Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life of the Spectrum,” already named a “Top Amazing Feminist Book of 2018,” received a starred review from Booklist, and is an Amazon #1 New Release.
At the age of thirty-five, Jennifer O’Toole was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome (autism), just after her three young children had been similarly identified. It was 2011, and for the first time in her life, things made sense.
They made so much sense, in fact, that now, Jennifer is the winner of the Autism Society of America’s 2014 Outstanding Literary Work of the Year and the 2012 Temple Grandin Award for Outstanding Global Contributions, was named one of the 50 Most Influential Women in North Carolina and 25 Most Amazing Autistic Women, is a recipient of GRASP’s Distinguished Spectrumite Parenting Medal and the Make-A-Wish Foundation’s Women Inspiring Hope and Strength Award, was named AuKids Speaker of the Year, and has been celebrated by Disney’s Babble and The Mighty. She is “Ask the Expert” columnist for healthline.com, a featured columnist for Spectrum Woman Magazine, sits on the Professional Panel of the Autism Society of America, and is a go-to editorialist/columnist for Amy Poehler’s girl-power juggernaut, “Smart Girls at the Party.”
From her own struggles and self-discovery, Jennifer has built an empire of empowerment. She’s been invited to speak on Capitol Hill, and to the President’s Council on Fitness at the White House Summit on Americans with Disabilities, was the Guest of Honor of Their Royal Highnesses, the UK’s Princess Sophie and Princess Marie of Denmark. She and was added to the “Who’s Who” list of International Aspie Mentors — along with Temple Grandin and Stephen Shore – to contribute to Dr. Tony Attwood’s “Been There. Done That. Try This.” anthology. Jennifer’s unique “have a cup of coffee with me” conversationalist presentation of useful insights has touched hearts, lightened spirits, and broadened minds around the world.







