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Buddha's Bedroom: The Mindful Loving Path to Sexual Passion and Lifelong Intimacy Paperback – Jan 2 2019

4.9 out of 5 stars 14 customer reviews

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Product details

  • Paperback: 216 pages
  • Publisher: Reveal Press (Jan. 2 2019)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1684031184
  • ISBN-13: 978-1684031184
  • Product Dimensions: 15.2 x 1.4 x 22.9 cm
  • Shipping Weight: 318 g
  • Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars 14 customer reviews
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #23,657 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Product description


"True mastery is rare and precious--and Cheryl Fraser is truly a master of her subject. Written with a wonderful combination of simplicity and thoroughness, heart and intellect, and profundity and practicality, this is a phenomenal book on intimate sensuality, and equally excellent about communication skills and mindful awareness. Wow--a wonderful book."
--Rick Hanson, PhD, author of Buddha's Brain--Rick Hanson, PhD

"Sex and spirituality have been awkward bedfellows for as long as anyone can remember, and now we live in an era with plenty of chaos, confusion, misunderstanding, and contention about sexual roles and sexual acts. Here comes Cheryl Fraser to offer clarity, encouragement, and some very sound advice about how to ignite passion while remaining aware. She lets us know how we can dance and share with another--lovingly--and with the kind of mindfulness that doesn't drape a big, wet blanket over the proceedings."
--Barry Boyce, editor-in-chief of Mindful magazine--Barry Boyce

Buddhist teachings, traditionally the province of celibate monastics, can be confusing for lay practitioners when it comes to relationships, sensuality, and sexuality. Freedom from desire as a Buddhist goal seems inconsistent with sexuality in particular. However, Fraser does a beautiful job of demonstrating how the transient lust that relationships begin with can be transformed into an expression of love, compassion, and a manifestation of the Seven Factors of Awakening."
--Culadasa (John Yates, PhD), spiritual director and chair of Dharma Treasure Buddhist Sangha, and author of The Mind Illuminated and Brain Science for Greater Mindfulness--Culadasa (John Yates, PhD)

"Cheryl Fraser faced a daunting task in writing a book which integrates sex, love, and meditation. Buddha's Bedroom is a unique book in presenting readers with a love Dharma that teaches couples to value intimacy and passion. The message of Buddha's Bedroom is that if you utilize Buddhist principles to focus on your own mind, passion in your relationship will be enhanced. Her exercises, especially the Buddhist skill of mindfulness, empower and motivate couples to be awaken lovers."
--Barry McCarthy, PhD, is a professor in the department of psychology at American University, and coauthor of Finding Your Sexual Voice--Barry McCarthy, PhD

"Cheryl Fraser, in her beautifully written and engaging book, Buddha's Bedroom, reminded me how the power of presence and intention can vitalize and sustain a romantic relationship. As well as being simply fun to read, I found the book to be useful in many ways. From building curiosity in the bedroom to falling in love with your partner over and over again to practicing the skills of lovemaking, Fraser has created a meaningful book that, whether single or partnered, all can relish. Awareness to the joy of love and sex is a wonderful way to live inside of relationship. My gratitude for a fantastic book!"
--Robyn D. Walser, PhD, licensed clinical psychologist, coauthor of The Mindful Couple, and author of The Heart of ACT--Robyn D. Walser, PhD

"If you're looking for a guide to lasting connection, passion, and ultimately more love in your life--inside and outside the bedroom--you'll want to pick up this book. Cheryl not only lays out the path to greater sexual intimacy and happiness, but also practical skills that we can all do to enhance our lives and ultimately bring more love into the world."
--Elisha Goldstein, PhD, creator of A Course in Mindful Living--Elisha Goldstein, PhD

"Sacred sex. Prolonged pleasure. Conscious climax. It's all part of using your sexual bliss energy to become an awakened lover, and Cheryl Fraser--a renowned Buddhist psychologist--is your guide to transcendent sex."
--Ian Kerner, sex therapist, and author of the New York Times bestseller, She Comes First--Ian Kerner

"Fraser asks pointedly, 'Why add the wisdom teachings of Buddhism to a book about passion? Quite simply, because they work.' Buddha's Bedroom folds the wisdom of Buddha Dharma into the practicalities of love and sex to form a beautiful, thoughtful, and compassionate window into how 'old sex' can become new again. She shares her meditation exercises that she has used with countless couples in Buddha's Bedroom, and teaches the reader how to awaken the passion that has been sleeping inside them.

This book is for anyone in a love relationship who wants to fall in love again (with the same person), and is willing to examine within themselves to discover that they possess the key to happiness. Fraser weaves in real stories from the couples who have walked the path with her, along with her own candid (and entertaining) experiences to illustrate to the reader how to bring Buddha back into the bedroom. I will recommend this book to my own clients (and friends!) and suggest that they clip each of the 'Love Bytes' and 'Buddha Bytes' scattered throughout the book!"
--Lori A. Brotto, PhD, registered psychologist, Canada research chair in women's sexual health, professor at the University of British Columbia, and author of Better Sex Through Mindfulness--Lori A. Brotto, PhD

"Fraser brings a fresh, enlightening voice to relationship literature. She applies a spectrum of Buddhist principles and practices to the inevitable suffering that arises in the quest for enduring love. Whether schooled in Buddhism or newly discovering its wisdom, readers will find abundant, readily accessible tools for handling disappointments and conflict, and overcoming negative reactivity. Buddha's Bedroom is inspiration and guide for a lifelong journey of mindfully engaged, joyful, passionate intimacy."
--Miranda Shaw, PhD, associate professor of religious studies at the University of Richmond, and author of Passionate Enlightenment and Buddhist Goddesses of India--Miranda Shaw, PhD

"Cheryl Fraser puts power back into her readers' hands--and minds--by helping them realize that they are in control of their own happiness, reawakening passion and enriching their sex lives in a loving, mindful manner along with some changes in behavior. I'm looking forward to sharing her words of wisdom, couples skills, and mindfulness techniques with my clients so that they too can bring Buddha into their bedrooms."
--Sara Dimerman (aka helpmesara), psychologist, and author of several books, including Why Married Couples Don't have Sex--Sara Dimerman (aka helpmesara)

About the Author

Sharp, frank, and fearless,Cheryl Fraser, PhD, is a Buddhist psychologist and sought-after relationship expert. She has helped thousands of couples jump-start their love life and create passion that lasts a lifetime.

A highly successful and awarded Fulbright scholar, she has conducted extensive research on sexual behavior and what causes love relationships to succeed or fail. With her groundwork, she created the Become Passion online workshop for couples. She has a thriving private practice in sex and couples therapy.

A former talk radio host, Cheryl is a dynamic guest expert for television and radio, appearing on multiple programs, including The Experts, CBC Marketplace, Air America, the Loving Well podcast, and many more.

As a columnist for Mindful and Best Health magazines, Cheryl explores love, sex, relationships, and the human experience. Her approach to life and to helping others is based in her practice of meditation and Buddhism, which she has studied for twenty-five years in both the Tibetan and Theravaden traditions. She was given permission to teach by her root teacher Namgyal Rinpoche, and she is resident meditation teacher for Island Dharma. Her work is encapsulated in the teaching of Mindful Loving, where she brings the Buddha's teachings into the bedroom.

When Cheryl is not in India, Tibet, or at a three-month silent Buddhist meditation retreat, she lives on Vancouver Island, BC, Canada, with her man and their menagerie, practicing the passion she preaches.
Jack Kornfield, PhD, is cofounder of the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA, and a founding teacher of Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Woodacre, CA. He is author of many books, including A Path with Heart and The Wise Heart .
Trudy Goodman, PhD, is a senior Vipassana teacher in Los Angeles, CA; cofounder of the Growing Spirit program; and contributing author to several books, including Wisdom and Compassion in Psychotherapy, Clinical Handbook of Mindfulness, and Mindfulness and Psychotherapy .

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