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Crossroads Road: A Novel by [Kay, Jeff]
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Crossroads Road: A Novel Kindle Edition

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Length: 264 pages Word Wise: Enabled Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
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Product Description

Product Description

Jovis McIntire's quiet life in the suburbs is turned upside down the day his mother-in-law wins $234 million in a multi-state lottery. She quickly makes an identical offer to all her children and their families: a large, custom-built home, and two million dollars cash.

But there's a catch, a nasty hook hidden inside the bait. If the deal is accepted, they will be required to live together on a newly-created cul-de-sac in southern California, for the remainder of the matriarch's life — a woman Jovis sarcastically calls Sunshine.

Not a chance!

And that would only be the beginning of it, he knows. The rest of his wife's family is no prize, either. Nancy the bohemian earth child with organic, free-range armpits, Kevin the pompous scarf-wearing intellectual, Sue the 400-pound attention junkie who throws herself down flights of stairs for sympathy… Jovis sees them all as kooks, in one way or another, and they want him to live amongst them? Not for a million bucks! Or two million, even.

But his defiance begins to fade when Jovis returns to his job, and realizes he's now there by choice.

Crossroads Road is the first novel by Jeff Kay, proprietor of the popular humor site The West Virginia Surf Report! It is a rollicking comedy, perfect for fans of National Lampoon's Vacation, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

An early reader called the book "relentlessly hilarious."

About the Author

Jeff Kay has maintained The West Virginia Surf Report!, a strangely addictive humor website, since late 2000. He grew up in Dunbar, West Virginia, and now lives near Scranton, Pennsylvania with his wife, two sons, and a border collie named Andy (aka Blacklips Houlihan). Crossroads Road is his first novel.

Product Details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 567 KB
  • Print Length: 264 pages
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Publisher: Smoking Fish Media (March 28 2011)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B004UC538I
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: Be the first to review this item
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #920,476 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) 4.2 out of 5 stars 183 reviews
37 of 38 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Who Doesn't want to Win The Lotto? Sept. 4 2011
By Judi Coltman - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I just finished Kay's CrossRoads Road. I want to say upfront, that while 3 stars may seem a meager endorsement, it is not. The characters in Kay's book are frighteningly well written, unlovable and at the same time endearing. I certainly could relate to the odd family dynamics and that's what makes the book fun. It's like watching a trainwreck with the commentator of Saturday Night Live's news.

The premise, to get a fist full of cash and change his life, Jovis and family must heed the requirements put forth by his mother-in-law. Part of me wanted to just yell, "Run Away!" but who runs from 2 mil right? Kay expounds on the day-to-day activities of setting up life, with all of the nonsense it entails and he does it well. When he and his son travel a distance to help his sis-in-law and her spouse move, I was there feeling his frustration at their complete lack of urgency which translated into total selfishness. I know those people.

What I found lacking, however, was a decent sewing up of characters and scenarios. Perhaps that was his intent, but it bugged me. The ending seemed a little too outlandish and the second to last chapter seemed completely out of place. I felt myself asking questions that needed answers but were instead glossed over in an effort to move on.

Would I suggest it to others? Yes. Would it make a good movie? I think perhaps. I've read some incredible books in my life that merit 5 stars and 4, this stands as a solid 3 +
36 of 40 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fantastic First Novel from a one-handed hair whipper March 30 2011
By John H. - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Jeff Kay has already been entertaining multitudes on the web with his website "The West Virginia Surf Report". And now he has created the kind of novel that his fans would expect. Funny and full of well turned phrases that will soon be creeping into your vocabulary, like yard biscuits, translucent, doucheketeer, and involuntary power sodomy.

I am so glad I found Jeff Kay on the web and now his terrific book.

I read it on the Kindle, wotta deal!
24 of 26 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Laugh Out Loud Read March 31 2011
By Terri - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Jeff creates a great cast of characters and shows how family and money don't always mix. Read this book straight through and recommend to anyone that wants to have a good laugh.
15 of 16 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Very funny but a little thin in spots Nov. 9 2011
By RTCnME - Published on
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I've been following Jeff Kay's West Virginia Surf Report for a few years and am an artist myself, so when he published Crossroads Road I certainly wanted to support a fellow creative and hopefully get a few laughs out of it too. On that front Crossroads Road certainly delivers. As always, Kay is wonderful at creating quirky characters who seem to embody every wing-nut and whack-job you have ever encountered in your life. He excels at writing biting dialogue with enough one-liners to keep you laughing through even the most embarrassing or gut wrenching scenarios. BUT, I did feel that reading Crossroads Road was a bit like reading a pilot script for any number of the "edgy" humor oriented TV shows populating the various cable channels these days. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but to me the kind of writing Kay does in this novel seems like he found himself stuck between wanting to expand what he does in his blog, but not quite having the depth and breadth to really create a stand alone humor novel. I think he has the chops to do it, but maybe in wanting to get the book published and out in front of readers, he rushed the development a bit. Still, you could easily see this cast of characters returning for another wacky adventure, and perhaps if Kay were to develop a series that would allow him to delve deeper into each individual character (as pleasant or unpleasant as that could be!) he might be able to give them some real depth. Still, a solid first effort with some genuine laugh-out-loud moments. I'm looking forward to what he does next.
22 of 25 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Humor, not much else..... April 23 2012
By Kathy - Published on
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase many problems with this book. First off, I gave it 2 stars for the humor. I did find myself laughing out loud a few times but mostly I was frustrated with the main character.

Spoilers to come - First off, what kind of idiot gives 6 months notice at a job these days? Many company's will ask you to leave after 2 weeks because they know your loyalty lies elsewhere now. Wait until 2 weeks next time. Second, how can your realtor sell your house out from under you when she didn't even bring you an offer to accept or refuse and why would you sign a contract to sell your home immediately when you're not leaving for 6 months? Third, if you knew your relatives were annoying and the house you were getting wasn't going to be ready for 6 months, why go out there at all? Why not rent an apartment in your current town, continue your current job and wait then go out when it's ready, get your money then say "screw the house" and leave town with the 2 mil and your sanity?

The main character spent the whole book telling us everyone else was nuts but it was Jovis who was nuts. Now if this was the point of the whole book, I got that pretty quick and didn't need to finish it. This book annoyed me to my very core. I hate wasting time reading about idiots.

Sorry, can't recommend this one.