From Difficult to Delightful in Just 30 Days: How to Improve the Behavior of Your Spirited Child Paperback – May 3 2006
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From the Back Cover
Turn your "problem" child into a happy child--no drugs, no therapy, no nonsense
If you're the parent of a difficult child, you understand the frustrations of dealing with daily tantrums, tearful tirades, and other troublesome behavior. You may have even resorted to therapy or drugs. But if you follow the simple, commonsense steps described in this book, you will see a remarkable turnaround in your child’s behavior--in only four weeks.
Based on Dr. Jacob Azerrad’s thirty-five years of experience as a child psychologist, this back-to-basics parenting program is a proven method for transforming the behavior of the most problematic child—even one diagnosed with ADHD. Dr. Azerrad’s method is surprisingly simple and really works. In fact, you’ll see a delightful difference in your difficult child almost immediately.
Dr. Azerrad's family-friendly guide will show you how to:
- Deal with tantrums,aggression,and other destructive
- Reinforce good behavior with a proven reward system
- Relearn the dos and don’ts of good parenting
- Avoid using behavioral drugs to control behavior
In just thirty days, tears will give way to smiles, conflicts will be resolved by cooperation, and "no" will become "yes." It’s the best thing you will ever do for your child--and for yourself.
About the Author
Dr. Jacob Azerrad has practiced as a child psychologist for thirty-five years. He has appeared on "The Oprah Winfrey Show," "Phil Donahue," and other national television shows and has published articles in Psychology Today, Parents, and the Boston Globe.
Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Consequently, my opinion is that perhaps this book is best for parents like myself with very young kids with "normal" behavior problems that are not rooted in something biological or chemical.
I have a 5 1/2 year old who is very intelligent and can be delightful, but is much of the time whiny, complaining, demanding, and very negative at home. He is horrible at hearing "no" said to him and handling disappointment. On the other hand, at school, he hardly ever gets in trouble, he interacts well with others, and has plenty of friends. My son does not have a psychological condition, but he has been conditioned to act a certain way at home - I will not hesitate to take some responsibility for that. Personally, I felt like this book spoke to my situation.
The book is a fast and easy read. The methods described in this book were easy to understand and implement. Yes, perhaps it's intuitive that we should use positive reinforcement and not focus on the negative, but I will admit that I haven't done that very well over the years and this book gave me some guidance and inspiration.
I love that this book focuses on very young children - i.e., age 6 or 7 and younger, so it felt more tailored to my children. A lot of childcare books out there try to cover the gamut of children from infants to teenagers, and as a result contains a lot of extraneous material you don't need for your own childcare issues.
Anyhow, this book is good because it discusses the disservice we're doing to our children by not correcting their bad behavior early on. Running into the street and other destructive behaviors must be stopped and if they aren't, there will be consequences for the child in their adult life (if they make it that long). Plus, it has made me realize that there are certain behaviors that I don't have to put up with. It's OK to correct now; not everything is just a stage that we need to live through. My son doesn't have ADHD. He's just full of energy and he thinks he's really funny when he's being defiant. However, I think there is a lot of really valuable information in this book for every parent with a challenging child.
Finally, the book isn't negative at all. It helps parents to identify opportunities to praise their children for all the good they do. By taking the emphasis off of the moments when they're driving us mad, and focusing instead on the moments that make us proud, we begin to teach our children.
Last note: The author spends a lot of time arguing about the overuse of drugs to control child behavior. While I agree with him, I skipped a lot of that information because it wasn't useful to me at this stage.
Ignore the diatribe against ADHD drugs if you want, I don't think it's all that well-founded, perhaps it's too broad brush. But I would agree with his diatribes against just about every other book every written on child rearing, lots of them teach parents to inavertently reinforce bad behavior. "The Incredible Years" is another good book, available from U of Washington Parenting Training program.
This book claims that ADHD and other similar disorders are caused by the parents of said children, bringing behavioral therapy back into the dark ages where parents of such children sent them off to institutions to raise when they felt like failures by the system that claimed to want to help them. He blames every other type of behavioral intervention for creating kids with attentional, defiant and other problems, yet amazingly most of his examples are of children with very minor issues caught quite early in the game--their first 3 years--when most issues are easily corrected by maturity.
If ADHD and other developmental disorders are caused by the parents inability to discipline, then why are only 25% of a single family's kids diagnosed? He never adequately answers that which totally defeats his thesis.
Yes, his behavioral recommendations are sound--positive reinforcement only for positive behaviors and swift removal of positive reinforcement for negative behaviors with immediately telling the child that the behavior is not to be done. This is absolutely nothing new and he adds nothing to what teachers, counselors, psychologists and, yes, caring parents already know.
The only other positive I'd say about this book is that its a quick read with short chapters--easy to take in during trips to the restroom...
Obviously I will not be recommending this book to the parents I work with as an occupational therapist.
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