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Divorce Poison New and Updated Edition: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing Paperback – Jan 19 2010
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From Publishers Weekly
In Divorce Poison: Protecting the Parent-Child Bond from a Vindictive Ex, Richard A. Warshak (The Custody Revolution) offers guidance to parents whose exes portray them to their children in a negative light, whether it's mild, off-the-cuff badmouthing or systematic character assassination. Common psychological wisdom, besides recommending that parents avoid fighting fire with fire, suggests doing nothing. But Warshak has witnessed the feelings of powerlessness and the increasing difficulties that come from doing nothing. So he provides "a blueprint for an effective response grounded in a solid understanding of the techniques and dynamics of parents who poison their children's relationships with loved ones." After describing numerous nuances of inter-parental malignment (brainwashing, false abuse accusations, revisionist history, etc.), Warshak moves on to "Poison Control," both independently and with the help of professional counselors. This book will seem a godsend to the many divorcs who are bashed by their ex-spouses. (Regan Books, $26 304p ISBN 0-06-018899-5; Jan.)
Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.--This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Some level of animosity is typical in divorce, but when parents let those feelings degenerate into bad-mouthing, bashing, or brainwashing, they run the risk of emotionally damaging their children, according to child psychologist Warshak. He looks at the poisonous relationships that develop when parents carry criticism of their ex-spouses too far: parents and children estranged from one another, protracted and bitter custody and visitation battles, and even ruined relationships with the extended families. He uses case studies to illustrate how parents--sometimes unconsciously, sometimes deliberately--force children to choose between them and turn against the other parent. He describes a range of difficulties, from tainted parent-child relationships to an emotional disturbance known as parental alienation syndrome. Warshak offers strategies for parents to examine their motivations when they speak against a former spouse, to curb negative impulses, and to repair damage that may already have been done. Useful resource for families dealing with divorce and child rearing. Vanessa Bush
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Top Customer Reviews
I told my lawyer about it and she bought it right away. A must read.
Whether you suspect that divorce poison may just be starting or have a full blown case and have been estranged from your children for some time, this book can help you. It may be particularly useful for parents who refuse to play the kind of dirty pool their ex is playing with the children, but end up suffering the loss or diminishing of a relationship with their children as a result of taking the high ground. The sad irony with divorce poison is that it is the parent who tries to take the high ground and not turn the kids against their ex who suffers the most. The good news in this book is that you do not have to fight fire with fire -- there is a way out of the labyrinth of smoke and mirrors that your ex may have set up for your kids -- and you can find reasonable ways to help your kids reconnect with you, no matter how estranged they seem. I have used several of the techniques and advice in this book and it has resulted in an improvement in my own relationship with my daughters, whose respect and care for me their father has been eroding for years, to the point of serious issues and fractured relationships. Within a short amount of time of reading the book and employing the various techniques and suggestions I have seen distinct and very positive results.Read more ›
Dr. Warshak writes in an easy-to-read style, and gives many helpful hints to ward off the effect of "divorce poison". He is right on target. It seemed as if he were writing about our situation. He is thorough, and leaves no question unanswered.
I have written to him, and received a response. He is both compassionate and understanding, and the children are the focus of his concern.
I would recommend this book to anyone divorced with kids, and not just those who are newly divorced. It took almost 12 years for this situation to manifest itself in our family.
Most recent customer reviews
Definitely a good guide book for learning how to deal with your psychotic ex wife. A real good read. Wish I had to get it before the divorce.Published 2 months ago by Amazon Customer
A very important book to help focus those involved in parental alienation divorces. It has helped me to provide my kids with ways to understand what has been happening throughout... Read morePublished 10 months ago by Mike Klassen
People should have to read these kinds of books before getting a divorce if they have kids. I recommend books like this one to others who have children and are going through a... Read morePublished 16 months ago by Samantha
A book that should be read before marital separation if possible. Never underestimate an ex's potential to use your children as a weapon against you when a marriage fails.Published on March 10 2014 by D. Bell
I recommend to anyone going through separation/divorce with kids. I have not read it to the end yet but so far am fascinated by what I have learned.Published on March 22 2013 by Margaret Kwiatkowska
This is a very good book. I really enjoyed this book and I would recommend it to anyone going through a divorce.Published on March 12 2013 by Marlene Perry
I really appreciated this book, the author is clearly an expert on the topic. There are plenty of concrete examples and specific things to try for people who are in this situation. Read morePublished on Oct. 17 2012 by Renï¿½e Landry