Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men Paperback – Sep 2 2003
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From Publishers Weekly
This fascinating investigation into what makes abusive men tick is alarming, but its candid handling of a difficult subject makes it a valuable resource for professionals and victims alike. Bancroft, the former codirector of Emerge, the nation's first program for abusive men, has specialized in domestic violence for 15 years, and his understanding of his subject and audience is apparent on every page. "One of the prevalent features of life with an angry or controlling partner is that he frequently tells you what you should think and tries to get you to doubt or devalue your own perceptions and beliefs," he writes. "I would not like to see your experience with this book re-create that unhealthy dynamic. So the top point to bear in mind as you read [this book] is to listen carefully to what I am saying, but always to think for yourself." He maintains this level of sensitivity and even empathy throughout discussions on the nature of abusive thinking, how abusive men manipulate their families and the legal system and whether or not they can ever be cured. Jargon-free analysis is frequently broken up by interesting first-person accounts and boxes that distill in-depth information into simple checklists. Bancroft's book promises to be a beacon of calm and sanity for many storm-tossed families.
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
From Library Journal
Bancroft, a former codirector of Emerge, the first U.S. program for abusive men, and a 15-year veteran of work with abusive men, reminds readers that each year in this country, two to four million women are assaulted by their partners and that at least one out of three American women will be a victim of violence by a husband or boyfriend at some point in her life. His valuable resource covers early warning signs, ten abusive personality types, the abusive mentality, problems with getting help from the legal system, and the long, complex process of change. After dispelling 17 myths about abusive personalities, he sheds light on the origin of the abuser's values and beliefs, which he finds to be a better explanation of abusive behavior than reference to psychological problems. Bancroft extends his approach to problematic gay and lesbian relationships as well, making the book that much more useful and empowering. This is essential reading for those in the helping professions and highly recommended for all libraries, especially those in communities with emergency shelter programs. Dale Farris, Groves, TX
Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Top Customer Reviews
It explains the abusive personality, dispells the myths about abusive men, gives the survivor solid ways to know if he is changing and reasons why he does not choose to change. It also includes reasons not to seek couple counselling, which is something that cannot be stressed enough.
I lend this book to all my clients and encourage them to purchase it.
Most recent customer reviews
If you are in this kind of relationship or know someone who is, this book is a must have... you cannot help but see your life on paper. Read morePublished 2 months ago by faye dunn
Recommended by my family doctor for a friend of mine, fantastic book. It has really opened her eyes and she often talks about it.Published 6 months ago by Tracey
reading it over and over, always new answers and details that become very helpfullPublished 6 months ago by mariasweetheart
After finding myself in a manipulative, emotionally abusive relationship, and managing to get out relatively early, I found this book. Read morePublished 7 months ago by Lucy N.
I wish I had been given this book years ago! I felt like I was the only one that heard and had these things happen, it was so educational for my road to healing, as well as... Read morePublished 8 months ago by Brenda Raven
An absolute must for anyone in an abusive relationship. All the excuses n lies u have been led to believe u will get the real truth. Read morePublished 9 months ago by Amazon Customer
I cried for seven years and then I read this book...and I stopped crying.Published 9 months ago by Jane
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