Losing Control, Finding Serenity: How the Need to Control Hurts Us And How to Let It Go Paperback – Jul 30 2012
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About the Author
About the Author page Meet Danny Miller, Like most compulsive controllers, Danny Miller was always driven to succeed. He graduated from UCLA with honors in business administration and finished in the top 5 percent of his class at the UCLA School of Law. While still in his 20s, he became a popular real estate instructor in the UCLA extension program and a few years later published a critically acclaimed, best-selling professional book, How to Invest in Real Estate Syndicates (Dow Jones-Irwin) He also founded the California Institute of Real Estate Education, which offered state-licensed seminars to thousands of real estate professionals. Financial success came early as well. Celebrities and wealthy people entrusted him with large sums to invest on their behalf. By his mid-30s he could afford to live in the exclusive Old Bel Air section of Los Angeles, only a few doors away from Sylvester Stallone and just up the street from where Elvis Presley had once lived. But for all his achievements and success, Danny had no sense of inner peace and serenity. How could he? He was imprisoned by his fears, anger and anxieties and thus not open to the wonders all around him. It took a long series of personal setbacks, but at last Danny began a new life journey based on letting go of control. He tried to go with the ups and downs and twists and turns of life, instead of resisting them and trying to control people and events. He learned effective tools and techniques for losing control in important areas such as family, parenting, love and romance, the creative arts, sports, and the workplace. He became an accomplished fine artist, a published poet, a champion tournament tennis player, a happily married man, and much wiser parent--all while cutting his work time by more than half. Thus, through letting go of control, Danny found a different and more profound kind of success--an internal, core sense of well-being. He now counsels others and writes and speaks about the remarkable benefits of letting go of control. To read Danny's articles on control and his poetry, and to view his paintings, visit www.losingcontrolfindingserenity.com
Top Customer Reviews
I was looking for something that would help me to relax and worry less about my own performance in a quest to allow the more creative side come out
Most Helpful Customer Reviews on Amazon.com (beta)
Not all of us had wonderful and wise parents, grandparents or aunts and uncles who took the time to teach us life's lessons about self, or others. This fact makes authors like these invaluable to people like myself, who consider themselves students of life.
If you are researching this book at all, it probably means you should read it.
In it you will undoubtedly find elements of your own individual yet uncanny likenesses to others in the world.
In my own life, as the adult child of two adult children of alcoholics--everything in my world was controlled by my denial and shame based parents--but especially my mother. I felt like a specimen on a petri dish--and as a result--I sadly felt the need to control my own emotions and behaviors around her. I never felt free or safe...instead I felt judged, afraid, and in fear of criticism in every moment--including sleep--as nightmares were a norm.
As a young adult woman, I struggled with eating disorders, and anxiety. As a new mother, I feared not being good enough for my newborn son, and worried myself sick over what others would think of my abilities or lack of.
Twelve years into my codependent marriage, I divorced my then husband, and found myself face to face with the devil. My fears were all in my mind...and were the result of my childhood programming.
Losing my need to control and or worry about what others thought about me--eventually taught me to simply let go...and when I did...slowly and incrementally peace and joy began to seep itself into my life.
This book is full of practical insights to why and how we can change.
Lisa A. Romano
Rahamim Ron - Israel
Never condescending or facile, the book's gentle `repetitive' encouragement is enjoyable and powerful. I loved it
Gabrielle Blackman-Sheppard (aka Bi-Polar Girl)
The book covers many topics that are helpful for losing control: what being controlling is like and how it hurts people, how to stop controlling behaviors, how to learn acceptance, how to embrace your personal truths, how to be less fearful and trust that life will turn out how it's supposed to, how to let go of anger and resentments, and how to stop avoiding tasks that you are apprehensive about. The book also describes and explains how to let go of control in certain parts of life, such as parenting, relationships, sports, the arts, and work.
This book is well worth the small investment. It is full of information on control, examples of the author and his friends of their controlling lives and how they changed, and how to change your controlling behaviors and your controlling personality. This book has the power to change your life for the better. I learned a lot from it and I highly recommend it.