Politically Correct Bedtime Stories Hardcover – Apr 1994
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James Finn Garner has taken 12 time-tested tales and retold them with the newfound sensitivity of our times. Here's a snippet from "Little Red Riding Hood":
Leap into a fairy-tale world where trolls are "dirt-accomplished and odor-enhanced," witches are "kindness-impaired," and Cinderella wears a gown "woven of silk stolen from unsuspecting silkworms." We can only regret that Garner had to exclude "The Duckling That Was Judged on Its Personal Merits and Not on Its Physical Appearance" for space reasons.
From Publishers Weekly
In this thin book Garner proposes to create "meaningful literature that is totally free from bias and purged from the influence of its flawed cultural past." The results are extremely funny. Updated to account for modern political sensibilities, these revisionist folktales reflect wit and an engaging knack for irony. In "Little Red Riding Hood," Grandma exacts her feminist revenge on the woodchopper, who "assumes that womyn and wolves can't solve their own problems without a man's help." In "The Frog Prince," the princess, now an "eco-feminist warrior," discovers that her dream frog is not a prince, but a real-estate developer. In other tales, Rapunzel becomes a self-reliant coffee-house singer and the Three Little Pigs armed guerrillas, while cultural imperialists such as The Big Bad Wolf and Goldilocks get what has been coming to them for centuries. The author strikes just the right tone here: clever, with more than a touch of self-awareness. And while each of these tales is short and easily digestible, in this case quickly read does not equal quickly forgotten. After one finishes this collection, "happily ever after" will never seem quite the same.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc.
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Top Customer Reviews
Garner uses political correctness in the extreme! For example, here is an excerpt from Little Red Riding Hood:
The wolf said, "You know, my dear, it isn't safe for a little girl to walk through these woods alone."
Red Riding Hood said, "I find your sexist remark offensive in the extreme, but I will ignore it because of your traditional status as an outcast from society, the stress of which has caused you to develop your own, entirely valid, worldview. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be on my way."
This book had me laughing out loud, sometimes with tears in my eyes. The only negative thing is that the stories do get a bit repetitive, like the original stories themselves. Therefore, it is best to savour them one at a time with space in between. I really had a lot of fun reading these silly PC stories.
No need to continue this travesty. James Finn Garner has edited these stories with the ruthless, post-modern sensibility of a San Francisco school board. His diligence has midwifed the thirteen stories in this book.
The stories introduce the following inspiring role models:
The young person Red Riding Hood who set off to empower her grandmother with a basket of healthful snacks, even though said grandmother was perfectly capable of taking care of herself as a mature adult.
The Emperor, who had been turned into a vain and wisdom-challenged tyrant by a lifetime of belief in the absolute legitimacy of the monarchy and in the inherent superiority of males, was sufficiently enlightened to endorse a clothing-optional lifestyle.
The three little pigs, who set up a model socialist democracy with free education, universal health care, and affordable housing for everyone. Copyright notice: Despite any imagined similarities, these pigs are completely different from any pigs George Orwell may have disrespectfully written about.
The three codependent goats gruff. `Nuff said.
Three bears, who lived together in a nuclear family, even though the nuclear family has traditionally served to enslave womyn, instill a self-righteous moralism in its members, and imprint rigid notions of heterosexualist roles onto the next generation.Read more ›
Dialog like this had me laughing throughout the book. The pied piper now clears a trailer park by playing country music so that new development can take place. Cinderella is now admonished by her fairy godperson to avoid wearing garments that bind her into the male concept of beauty and the three billy goats are now codependent.
If you are like me and find politically correct language annoying, then read this and for a short time laugh about how it sounds when it is used to build stories.
The fairytales presented in this volume include Little Red Riding Hood, The Emperor's New Clothes, The Three Little Pigs, Rumplestiltskin, The Three Codependent Goats Gruff, Rapunzel, Cinderella, Goldilocks, Snow White, Chicken Little, The Frog Prince, Jack and the Beanstalk, and the Pied Piper of Hamlin.
While all the stories are wonderful, Cinderella and the Frog Prince stand out and are my favorites. Read these two first!
While these stories are great if you just curl up and read them by yourself, they're even better when read aloud with a big group of your friends! But whatever you do, don't read these right before bedtime as the title suggests. You'll be laughing to hard to ever get to sleep.
These stories are suitable for children, but even more fun for adults. This book gets my highest recommendations.
POLITICALLY CORRECT BEDTIME STORIES . . . this is a
compilation of classic bedtime stories, retold in a manner that
is positive and self-esteem building to women, minorities, the
hearing impaired, the sight impaired, the differently-abled, gays, the third word, trees, shrubs, bushes, anorexics, bulimics, those in recovery, and spotted owls.
In the unlikely possibility that I left some groups out, I'm sure you will catch them if you listen and/or read the work. And doing so will help the author, who is to be commended for
pledging "his proceeds . . . to Native American reparations
in the form of casino trips."
To give a feel for the material, all you need to do is
check out the following from the first paragraph of the first story:
There once was a young person named Red Riding Hood who
lived with her mother on the edge of a large wood. One day
her mother asked her to take a basket of fresh fruit and
mineral water to her grandmother's house--not because
this was woman's work, mind you, but because the deed was
generous and helped engender a feeling of community.
Furthermore, her grandmother was not sick, but rather was in full physical and mental health and was fully capable of taking
care of herself as a mature adult.
Most recent customer reviews
Very politically correct, sometimes fairytales are dumb and need a better twist and this gives it.Published 18 months ago by Teagan Desautels
Very strange and not consistently politically correct. Amusing to a point, but I don't think I will buy the others in the series.Published 20 months ago by Richard Timmings
Very funny AND thought provoking. One caveat: some censorship may be needed when reading this book to younger children unless you don't mind answering a lot of questions!Published on Aug. 8 2013 by dtr
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