- Paperback: 304 pages
- Publisher: North Atlantic Books; Revised ed. edition (March 6 2012)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1583943668
- ISBN-13: 978-1583943663
- Product Dimensions: 15.3 x 2.2 x 22.9 cm
- Shipping Weight: 458 g
- Average Customer Review: 3 customer reviews
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #81,214 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Transformation through Intimacy, Revised Edition: The Journey toward Awakened Monogamy Paperback – Mar 6 2012
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“I love this book! There is a depth, a magic, and a sense of ultimate fulfillment that we find through learning to love one other person completely.… This is a hero’s and a heroine’s journey; it asks everything of us, but also gives us all we have ever longed for. We need a great guide on such a journey, and Masters is such a one, walking by our side as we venture into deeper waters, finding an ever-deeper healing and freedom through awakened monogamy.”—Arjuna Ardagh, author of The Translucent Revolution
“A thought-provoking, clear, passionate, and powerful road map straight to the nectar of intimate love. In the crucible/sanctuary of committed monogamous partnership, Masters shows us how to realize our deepest potentials for mutual healing, integration, and awakening, as well as how to come radically alive in what he calls ‘the ashram of the twenty-first century.’”—Katherine Woodward Thomas, author of Calling in “The One”
“An illuminating and practical book about how intimate relationship can be a path for deep healing, transformation, and awakening. Masters writes with strength and precision—pay particular attention to his groundbreaking chapters on emotion and sexuality.”—Gay Hendricks, PhD, author of Five Wishes and The Big Leap
“This is an important and tremendously useful book, packed with wisdom and insight. Highly recommended!”—Ken Wilber, author of The Integral Vision
“For anyone who wants to more deeply understand the seeming mystery of relationship—and transform their partnership to a sublime union of souls.”—Barry Vissell, MD, and Joyce Vissell, RN, MS, authors of The Shared Heart
“Transformation through Intimacy is so comprehensive, so down-to-earth, so vivid and raw, so unflinching and kind, so patient and persistent, it's hard to imagine that a more potent guidebook to healing the multiple dis-eases of today’s intimacies could possibly appear. There isn't a couple on earth, nor a single seeking someone to love, nor anyone exploring multiple partnering or other unconventional arrangements, who can't benefit by looking into the numerous mirrors Robert holds up here as he traces our potential growth through four stages of maturity in intimacy.... Robert has distilled into simple, ordinary essences his highly sophisticated awareness of philosophical, developmental, and clinical theory and his vast years of experience in therapeutic and teaching practice. The result is a book that anyone with a feeling heart, a questing mind, and a dedicated willingness to deeply encounter self and other can surely understand and grow from immensely—again and again."
—Saniel Bonder, founder, Waking Down in Mutuality, author of Ultimaya 1.0 and Healing the Spirit/Matter Split
“Robert Masters grabs us like no other couples therapist because his ear for the normalized reactivity and interpersonal laziness we bring to our close relationships is alarmingly familiar. No one can read this book and mindlessly fall back on ‘I’m doing the best I can’ or ‘I’m only human.’ But, happily … you will no longer want to. Masters’s no-nonsense recognition of our immaturity fuels a profound and hopeful understanding of couples development where a genuine trust in Beingness neither bypasses immaturity nor allows it to run the show. Through his own intense investigation of intimate relationship, Masters teaches us that if we are willing to roll up our sleeves, we can discover that what we have always wanted actually exists: the safety with our beloved to be raw and unfiltered … and the safety to truly live in our Bigness. At a time when many are questioning the viability of long-term monogamy, Transformation through Intimacy shows us that we ultimately have only two romantic choices: boredom or grace.”—Nancy Dreyfus, PsyD, author of Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love
“Transformation through Intimacy is a bold, refreshing guide for anyone craving a deeper, more authentic connection with their beloved—and willing to dive into new depths of compassion, understanding, and honesty. The rewards are exponential, as I’ve experienced personally. Robert truly is a master.”—Mary Allen, author of The Power of Inner Choice
“In this oh-so-brilliant book, Masters calls us out from behind our relational hiding places, reminding us that there is a sacred, expansive path lying in waiting for us beyond the bondage of our unconscious connections. With powerful and heartfelt language, he paints a new and wondrous portrait of possibility for intimate relationship, one that awakens us to the often unseen universe that lives between and within our hearts. It is right there, close at heart, just waiting to be uncovered, embraced, and explored. Transformation through Intimacy is a magnificent map of awakening. I highly recommend it to anyone who is ready to plunge deeper in their relational life.”—Jeff Brown, author of Soulshaping
“A profoundly illuminating book! Robert Augustus Masters’s breadth of expertise and depth of heart reveal the way to become intimate with all of who you are. His guidance is compassionate, penetrating, and clear as a bell, calling you into the very heart of relational intimacy. When Transformation through Intimacy becomes required reading for teenagers, our world will transform! Robert is truly a master of human transformation. If you are ready to deepen your emotional intelligence and experience wholehearted, wide-awake, relational intimacy, this book is for you.”—Terah Kathryn Collins, author of The Western Guide to Feng Shui
“Transformation through Intimacy is a plea that couples not settle for anything less than awakened monogamy, defined as attachment built on total trust that enlivens, gladdens, and expands. It sparkles with Masters’s many gems mined from decades of counseling and inner work.”—Marnia Robinson, author of Cupid's Poisoned Arrow
"This book will inspire you to do what it takes to create a deeply loving, monogamous—but not monotonous—relationship.”—Diana Daffner, author of Tantric Sex for Busy Couples
About the Author
Robert Augustus Masters, PhD, is a relationship expert, an integral psychotherapist, and a psychospiritual guide and trainer, with a doctorate in psychology. He is the cofounder, with his wife Diane, of the Masters Center for Transformation (MCT), a school featuring relationally rooted psychospiritual work devoted to deep healing and fully embodied awakening. He is also the author of many books (including Transformation Through Intimacy, Spiritual Bypassing, Emotional Intimacy, and To Be a Man) and an audio program: Knowing Your Shadow.
His uniquely integral, intuitive work, which he developed over the past thirty-seven years, dynamically blends the psychological and physical with the spiritual, emphasizing full-blooded embodiment, authenticity, emotional openness and literacy, deep shadow work, and the development of relational maturity.
At essence his work is about becoming more intimate with all that we are, in the service of the deepest possible healing, awakening, and integration. He works side by side and in very close conjunction with Diane. They live and work in Ashland, Oregon. His website is http://robertmasters.com.
He posts regularly on his Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/robertaugustusmasters
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TTI is a richly and lovingly written tapestry that illuminates a way forward for those of us who want more out of our relationships with each other. He invites us to move beyond our usual ideas of what intimate relationship offers and holds out a vibrant new vision to temp us. A vision where each of us meets the other fully, using whatever arises—no matter how challenging—as fuel for our mutual fire.
This is not about tolerating or romanticizing bad behaviour or abuse—quite the opposite. It is about learning to wake up to what is truly present in the space between us and then relate to each other from a fiercely compassionate heart. To stop expecting our partner to make us feel better, feel whole, feel complete, feel happy—instead to begin from that place inside ourselves—already complete in our glorious brokenness. To invite our chosen partner to walk with us on that path of ever deepening mutuality.
Masters provides deep insight into all our relational foibles. We recognize ourselves—past and present—on every page. All our patterns, dodges, rationalizations, obsessions, co-dependencies, laid bare with a loving hand that invites us to see how we can use all of this to find deeper love and fulfillment than we have before. And as we turn each page, find ourselves more deeply drawn into a vision of intimate relationship, the depth and power of which many of us have never even imagined was possible.
If you want to stop making the same mistakes over and over, if you have lost hope and are looking for guidance that will help you transform your current relationship, if you are currently seeking your new beloved and want to make sure you are ready to meet them fully and completely, TTI is the manual for how to do that.
Therapists will also find a wealth of new insight for working with couples. TTI includes therapeutic approaches and suggestions for how to work skillfully with each of the four major stages of relational maturity.
I highly recommend TTI for anyone who cares deeply about relationship—their own and others.
Most helpful customer reviews on Amazon.com
That said, it's quite thought-provoking and can stimulate great discussions in a book club, perhaps because it's so annoyingly vague and smug. It's worth reading for that, but the reader should expect to do a lot of work to wring value and meaning from it, and be prepared to feel a low-grade frustration throughout.