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Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame: A Relational/Neurobiological Approach Paperback – Illustrated, Feb. 2 2015

4.7 out of 5 stars 188 ratings

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Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Routledge; 1st edition (Feb. 2 2015)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 206 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1138831204
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1138831209
  • Item weight ‏ : ‎ 272 g
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 15.24 x 1.19 x 22.86 cm
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 out of 5 stars 188 ratings

Product description


"Shame is indeed a phenomenon that is both in the brain, the mind, and in the space between us. Dr. DeYoung does a solid job in addressing the challenges of living with and treating chronic shame using a thoughtful, humane, and scientific approach." Louis Cozolino, PhD, professor of psychology at Pepperdine University’s Graduate School of Education and Psychology

"Beginning with diverse clinical vignettes with very dissimilar diagnoses, Patricia DeYoung tackles the unvoiced but powerful presence of shame that so often lies at the unspoken core of what troubles our clients. She beautifully and evocatively gives voice and shape to the annihilating impact of lack of attunement. DeYoung also makes the point that because shame takes root in relationship, we must heal it relationally. Equally important, she reminds us that, to be effective in this work, therapists must engage in their own ongoing internal work. This special book needs to be read by all of us." Patricia L. Papernow, EdD, instructor in psychology at Harvard Medical School and author of Surviving and Thriving in Stepfamily Relationships

"Defining shame as first and foremost a relational experience, Patricia DeYoung unpacks the extensive, damaging consequences of feeling chronically shamed while illustrating effective treatment in clear, accessible language. For clinicians who wish to understand and treat shame from the psychodynamic perspective, this book is a vital resource." Martha Sweezy, PhD, associate director and director of training for the dialectical behavioral therapy program at Harvard Medical School’s Cambridge Health Alliance


"Understanding and Treating Chronic Shame by Dr. Patricia DeYoung is filled with a deep analysis of shame, how it operates, and how the psychotherapist/patient relationship can be the primary relationship that heals shame." Janay Anderson, Columbia University

About the Author

Patricia A. DeYoung, MSW, PhD, is a relational psychotherapist, clinical supervisor, and a founding faculty member of the Toronto Institute for Relational Psychotherapy.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
188 global ratings
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Top reviews from Canada

Reviewed in Canada on February 4, 2020
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5.0 out of 5 stars Unprecedented. The author understands more about me than myself !
By Jonathan Yim on February 4, 2020
Wow. Just Wow. Patricia, the author, understands me more than I do myself. I originally pirated the e-book and then I bought a hard copy just so I could lend it to my sister so she could understand about me and my mom and even herself.

My mom raised me by example to look for the best. She was always searching for the best. I took on the Internet at an early age and I tried to find the truth through the wisdom of the Internet. After going through many meditation books, spirituality teachers and books on trauma, I came across this book on Amazon after searching shame. When I read it, many times in this book came to me the epiphany: "This is EXACTLY how I feel !" The way Patricia writes the book is in a very clinical sense using some terms that my mind doesn't understand sometimes, but after awhile, I think I got the gist of them. The way she methodically writes about the different schools of thought on shame is so impressive and professional that she's almost like a doctor diagnosing me and writing a research journal. And it's emotional for me because I feel she understands how I feel about myself. Her writing is supported by her experience with patients that is invaluable to the knowledge she shares with the reader. If you're struggling inside, there is a very high chance that this book applies to you. The main theme of the book is shame, and after I discussed with someone its clinical definition from Patricia, she said back to me: "it's lack of love, right?" And it's exactly that, exactly how Patricia defines it in the book. The opposite of love is not fear. It is Shame !

I highly recommend this book. It's worth all the case studies, all the research, all the experience that Patricia brings to the table!
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Reviewed in Canada on December 12, 2018
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Reviewed in Canada on October 31, 2015
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Reviewed in Canada on June 23, 2019
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Reviewed in Canada on March 17, 2019
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Reviewed in Canada on June 4, 2018
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Top reviews from other countries

S. Pattison
5.0 out of 5 stars The best book on chronic shame
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 23, 2019
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20 people found this helpful
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Kindle Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Should be read by all therapists
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 10, 2017
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23 people found this helpful
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5.0 out of 5 stars Accessible, wise, clear and compassionate
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on August 13, 2019
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5 people found this helpful
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S. A. Beale
5.0 out of 5 stars Remarkable and inspiring book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on May 27, 2019
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3 people found this helpful
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5.0 out of 5 stars A valuable resource
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on April 20, 2018
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6 people found this helpful
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