- Paperback: 216 pages
- Publisher: Hazelden Publishing; 2nd ed. edition (March 8 2002)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1568387989
- ISBN-13: 978-1568387987
- Product Dimensions: 15.2 x 1.5 x 22.9 cm
- Shipping Weight: 363 g
- Average Customer Review: 13 customer reviews
- Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #343,943 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
It Will Never Happen to Me: Growing Up with Addiction As Youngsters, Adolescents, Adults Paperback – Mar 8 2002
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About the Author
Claudia A. Black, MSW, PhD, is a renowned lecturer, author and trainer internationally recognized for both her pioneering and contemporary work with family systems and addictive disorders. She designs and presents workshops and seminars, authors books and interactive journals, produces educational videos and consults to various healthcare programs in the United States and abroad. Dr. Black is currently the Clinical Consultant of Addictive Disorders for The Meadows and a Senior Fellow for the Meadows Institute in Wickenburg, Arizona. Dr. Black is the recipient of a number of National awards including the Marty Mann Award, the 1991 SECAD Award, and the NCA's Educator of the Year. She is also the past Chairperson of the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, presently serving on their Advisory Board and most recently, in celebration of Al-Anon's 50th anniversary, spoke on Capitol Hill to members of Congress, constituents and representatives of various addiction and treatment organization.Black's books generate wide appeal. She is the author of It Will Never Happen To Me (two million copies sold and now in its 2nd updated edition,) Changing Course, My Dad Loves Me, My Dad Has A Disease, Repeat After Me II, It's Never Too Late To Have A Happy Childhood, The Anger Guide, Relapse Toolkit and her latest release, A Hole in the Sidewalk. Claudia has produced eighteen videos including her two latest, The History of Addiction and The Legacy of Addiction and just released two new CDs, A Time for Healing from Abandonment and Shame and Putting the Past Behind.
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A central theme of the book is an exploration of the roles that ACOA adopt as a means of coping with the events around them - the responsible one, the adjuster, the placater and so on. Often in childhood these roles are appropriate in that they enable the child to cope with their often traumatic experiences. However, in adulthood the over-dependency on these roles can lead to obsessions, neurosis, mental health problems amongst other issues. Furthermore, in a family where alcohol is used in an unhealthy manner the child learns to 'don't talk, don't trust and don't feel'. Claudia Black gives the reader an insight in to the possibilities that exist for the adult child to break away from the scripts that have been set for them by others. The message is 'it doesn't have to be this way'.
I was the responsible child, the hero of my family. I did well at school, was good at sports, succeeded in almost all areas. I went on the University, gained a good degree, a counselling qualification and then a Masters - as an adult I was fulfilling my script to be responsible, to achieve, to be the hero. I was also in a succession of relationships where I took on the role of carer, replicating the role that had developed in my family. Along with some therapy, the books of Claudia Black were pivotal in my change process, moving away from who others wanted me to be to the person I wanted to work towards being.
This book alone cannot change the behaviour of the ACOA, words after all are only words! What this book does however, is provide the right words - full of wisdom and experience - that can motivate and inspire the ACOA to begin his/her journey to wholeness.
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