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Lessons from the Fat-o-sphere: Quit Dieting and Declare a Truce with Your Body Paperback – May 5 2009

by Kate Harding (Author), Marianne Kirby (Author)

4.3 68 ratings

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From the leading bloggers in the fat-acceptance movement comes an empowering guide to body image- no matter what the scales say.

When it comes to body image, women can be their own worst enemies, aided and abetted by society and the media. But Harding and Kirby, the leading bloggers in the "fatosphere," the online community of the fat acceptance movement, have written a book to help readers achieve admiration for-or at least a truce with-their bodies. The authors believe in "health at every size"-the idea that weight does not necessarily determine well-being and that exercise and eating healthfully are beneficial, regardless of whether they cause weight loss. They point to errors in the media, misunderstood and ignored research, as well as stories from real women around the world to underscore their message. In the up-front and honest style that has become the trademark of their blogs, they share with readers twenty-seven ways to reframe notions of dieting and weight, including: accepting that diets don't work, practicing intuitive eating, finding body-positive doctors, not judging other women, and finding a hobby that has nothing to do with one's weight.

Print length

272 pages
Language

English
Publisher

TarcherPerigee
Publication date

May 5 2009
Dimensions

12.95 x 1.78 x 19.05 cm
ISBN-10

0399534970
ISBN-13

978-0399534973
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About the Author

Kate Harding is an accomplished writer. She is the author of Asking For It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture—and What We Can Do About It. Previously, she collaborated with Anna Holmes, Amanda Hess, and a cast of thousands on The Book of Jezebel, and with Marianne Kirby on Lessons from the Fat-o-Sphere. Harding's essays have appeared in the anthologies Madonna & Me, Yes Means Yes, Feed Me, and Airmail: Women of Letters. She holds an MFA in fiction from Vermont College of Fine Arts and a BA in English from University of Toronto, and is currently at work on a PhD in creative writing from Bath Spa University.

Marianne Kirby is a writer, editor, and activist. She frequently contributes to women’s interest publications, news outlets, and television shows. She has been published by the Guardian, xoJane, the Daily Dot, Bitch Magazine, Time, and others. Kirby has appeared on TV and radio programs ranging from the Dr. Phil show to Radio New Zealand.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ TarcherPerigee; 1st edition (May 5 2009)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 272 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0399534970
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0399534973
Item weight ‏ : ‎ 210 g
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 12.95 x 1.78 x 19.05 cm

Customer Reviews:
4.3 68 ratings

About the authors

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Kate Harding
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Kate Harding is co-editor of Nasty Women: Feminism, Resistance, and Revolution in Trump's America, and author of Asking For It: The Alarming Rise of Rape
Culture--and What We Can Do About It. Along with her Nasty Women co-editor Samhita Mukhopadhyay, she hosts the podcast Feminasty.
Previously, she collaborated with Anna Holmes, Amanda Hess, and a cast of thousands on The Book of Jezebel, and with Marianne Kirby on Lessons from the Fat-o-Sphere. You might also remember her as the founding editor of Shapely Prose (2007-2010).
Kate's essays have appeared in the anthologies Madonna & Me, Yes Means Yes, Feed Me, and Airmail: Women of Letters. She holds an M.F.A. in fiction from Vermont College of Fine Arts and a B.A. in English from University of Toronto, and is currently at work on a Ph.D. in creative writing from Bath Spa University
[Photo by Jonathan Conklin]
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Marianne Kirby
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Marianne Kirby's debut novel Dust Bath Revival is one of the Best Books of 2016, according to Pop Culture Beast!
Marianne (a Tiptree Fellowship Honorable Mention for 2016) writes about bodies both real and imagined. She plays with the liminal space between vanishing and visibility; she thinks the things that go bump in the night need to spend some time in the sun. A long-time writer, editor, and activist, Marianne is a frequent contributor to women’s interest publications, news outlets, and tv shows that require people to have opinions. She has been published by the Guardian, xoJane, the Daily Dot, Bitch Magazine, Time, and others. She has appeared on tv and radio programs ranging from the Dr. Phil Show to Radio New Zealand. Marianne was born in Florida and returned there, because Florida Weird calls to its own. She has briefly escaped again but is already plotting her eventual winter migration.
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Soph

Great book

Reviewed in Canada on October 17, 2011

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I totally enjoyed reading, at last, a book that does not try to sell me how thin I should look.
And why, for my "health's sake".
Written by two girls who know what they're talking about, telling all about this big conspiracy against "fat"; And they're so honest about themselves too, you can actually relate to their life experiences. It's all about expanding... both accepting the expansion of your waistline, which is most likely not your fault, and expanding your consciousness about the false surveys done to become both fearfull and hatefull of your fat. Big financial interests for pills to gadgets have set the foundation for a lot of prejudice, leading to a fat-o-phobic society, presumingly fat that will surely kill you (says who, find out: read also "Health at any size").
I'm a better shopper now, I open my ears and eyes to this propaganda, and will not initiate anymore pettytalk about my (now non-existant) efforts and research to loose weight; I do notice it's not easy to change my own attitude of self-defeat and to get to a guilt-free way of eating like, for example, justifying my choice of lunch to co-workers. I'm finally reaching a truce where there is no "good" or "bad" food, for any reason. BUT: there are: "bad friends" and "wrong lovers" that send us subtle (or not so) messages about how they think we should look, but happily, good ones too!... how to tell the difference... and speak up!!
This book is a relief to us all: No "expert" to tell me what to eat and how many times a day I should jump up and down; At last authors explaining me with a great deal of everyday humor, that I'm very ok with the way I look, and feed myself. But rather, talented girls waking me up from a fat nightmare, directing my focus towards my LIFE and decisions that will transform it from good (or not so!)to great; I found a space where I can do and think sane ideas outside of my own perpertuation of fat fallacies.
Thank you girls for the truth. I do need more friends like you. I promise I will never settle for a cheap bra that does nothing for me. My next plan now is to get a good and darn sexy one (now that's uplifting!).

One person found this helpful

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Ariel

Cannot recommend enough.

Reviewed in Canada on December 22, 2018

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Love this book. 100% recommend to everyone. But especially people who want a real look at body positivity. This is still my go to body positive pick me up book.

Reviewed in Canada on May 2, 2018

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Should be mandatory reading in all schools.

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CONCERNED

Nope, didn't help me at all. I still ...

Reviewed in Canada on August 25, 2014

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Nope, didn't help me at all. I still want to be slim and I can't accept the way I am. Lol, true!

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Top reviews from other countries

M. Herrera

Eye Opener with Perspective

Reviewed in the United States on June 15, 2010

Verified Purchase

I became interested in Health at Every Size about 9 months ago, and since then have been reading here and there mostly online. So through blog posts and online communities I found out about this book.
Since I had been just picking up on things here and there online, having to research backwards to figure out what everyone was referencing in conversation, and where they were coming from, it was exciting to then find a book that is kind of a "101" of size acceptance and health at every size.

From reading various blogs online, I had begun to understand the basic element of 'yes we are fat, but we are still humans and we deserve to be treated as thus' and that was basically a revelation to my entire life of thinking and hearing "if only I/you were thinner", "when I'm thin I can...", and general bashing of women, both thin and fat alike.

While reading this book, I just kept thinking "WOW", all the time, "wow".
This book is a great introductory for people who are interested in improving their mental health and getting to know just what these 'crazy fat people' are talking about.

Many people seem to confuse the issue of Size Acceptance to giving up. This is not the same thing at all. Embracing Size Acceptance does not mean "oh well there is no point in being healthy, I'm going to eat 2 whole cakes every day" (visit [...] for more about 2 whole cakes...) it means that you may think "ok this is my body and I am going to love it, because its what I've got. It may take years to do, but its better than hating myself for the rest of my life for an arbitrary beauty standard". It means if you gain 5 lbs, you are not a worse person morally, and if you lose 5 lbs you are not a better person morally. You are a person.

When approached with this topic, I've noticed that many people get very angry and heated when proposed with even the IDEA that being fat is somehow NOT wrong. I was once this way myself. I used to think "how dare they! don't they see how UNHEALTHY they are!!?" and I never stopped to wonder where the basis for these thoughts came from. It was just something EVERYBODY KNEW. So I read this book, and I must say these ladies are educated and they are critical thinkers. It IS possible to be healthy and fat, at the same time. I know you wont' believe me, but read the book, Harding and Kirby have science and logic to back up what they are writing.

This book obviously hits on very sensitive issues. However I think this book is an absolute essential read, just to even attempt to take a step or two back, and look at your own prejudices and ideas that you may take for granted. If you've struggled with weight issues in ANY part of your life, whether it was 5 lbs or 500 lbs, this is a must read if you are unacquainted with Health at Every Size or Size Acceptance. I think this book can be monumentally helpful even if you've never had weight issues. For those that are naturally thin, it may help to understand that fat people don't need to be blamed or shamed, that our bodies are not public property, and the issue goes further than you think.

23 people found this helpful

Ana Mardoll

Perfect Introduction to Body Acceptance

Reviewed in the United States on March 10, 2010

Verified Purchase

Lessons from the Fat-O-Sphere / 0-399-53497-0

A perfect introduction to fat acceptance (FA) in particular and self acceptance in general, this book is a wonderful read for beginners and veterans alike. The writing is witty, direct, and insightful; never do you feel that the authors are being less than honest with you or that they are blowing smoke in your direction. The incisive writing is seasoned with a deep empathy for the reader - Kate Harding and Marianne Kirby speak to the reader like a tough-but-fair friend, able to bring reassurance and understanding without condescension and pity; exhortations and encouragement without being insensitive or cruel.

"Lessons" contains a little bit of everything: useful scientific data that even the veterans of FA may not have memorized (and so easy to whip out in paperback form to show the family!), tender and insightful dating advice, and practical exhortations (and blessings!) to live and enjoy life now, as you are. Excerpts from guest bloggers are included and are always up to the high writing standards of the authors: an African-American blogger gently points out the dangers of assuming that other cultures are more accepting than yours (and especially the downfalls of making those assumptions based on a small sample data of popular music and movies); a Fashionista blogger points out the silent despair behind the "buy clothes you can't wear as motivation" phenomenon; another blogger rips apart the serious and unacceptable dangers of fat-hating within the medical community and what harm and be wrought by doctors who tell patients they have no right to proper health care until they pass an arbitrary weight limit.

More than anything, "Lessons" is worth having, reading, and keeping because of the much-needed and strong feelings of camaraderie and acceptance that it provides. "You are not alone," the book assures readers, "and you are not a morally bad person simply because of your genetic makeup." Embracing fully the purest principles of self-acceptance, the authors never make the mistake of falling into different types of hate - instead they strongly exclaim the importance of gender-acceptance, race-acceptance, body-acceptance, and even fashion-acceptance. You cannot, they insist, truly love yourself if you are constantly judging others based on their hair, clothes, body shape, or anything else, as though those aspects of their physical person yield some kind of insight on their overall worth as a person. And, for that message alone, these "Lessons" are for everyone - no matter how fat or thin the reader may be.

~ Ana Mardoll

5 people found this helpful

Michelle

Overall good message but some flaws

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 20, 2021

Verified Purchase

Overall a good book however chapter 9 undermines the overall message of self love as it suggests just relying on a partner to replace self love and validation.

lunafish

Lessons in self-acceptance

Reviewed in the United States on June 9, 2009

Verified Purchase

After reading this book, I feel so uplifted. All my life I've been beating myself up for being too fat, not pretty enough, and not at all lovable. Suddenly I realize why: I'm constantly surrounded by negative messages that encourage self-hate...from my mom, my friends, and the media. "If you'd just lose 50 lbs, you'd feel so much better." "Oh, wouldn't you love to lose enough weight to fit in this outfit." "If you just stopped eating breakfast and lunch and exercised two hours every day, you could be so beautiful!" But the authors of this book are right: dieting doesn't work. I've lost weight so many times, and always gained it back. The fact that I lost it in the first place proves that I'm able to exercise self-restraint (to the point of pain and misery!), and the fact that I gained it back has nothing to do with my worth as a person. Some people ARE just naturally fat, just like others are naturally thin. Finally, I love the message that you shouldn't give up exercising just because you're not getting any thinner; some of the best results--getting out of the house, feeling more energetic, having long talks with my son while walking--have nothing to do with weight!

11 people found this helpful

Rioja

Great Place to Start.

Reviewed in the United States on April 8, 2010

Verified Purchase

This is an excellent book for those just getting into the Fat Acceptance movement and Health At Every Size. It covers a wide array of topics from why diets don't work to how to deal with the judgmental people in your life. The authors have done a wonderful job conveying a casual and understanding voice throughout, almost as if it were coming from a close friend. However, if you're familiar with Kirby and Harding's blogs, this book is likely to be a bit repetitive. While reading, I often found passages taken directly from the authors' various blog posts, which is perfectly fine, but I felt like I was taking a refresher-course rather than learning something new. I highly recommend this book to those who are just starting to come to terms with accepting their bodies, but if you're already immersed in FA and HAES, I would suggest that you don't limit your search for body acceptance literature to this book alone.

8 people found this helpful

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