One of the most important pieces of advice in Strangers in the Mirror by Marlene Steinberg is that those who have suffered dissociation/PTSD MUST LEARN to comfort themselves. Often those who are transitioning from one way of being to another, criticize themselves horribly about their imperfections. Sometimes this self flagellation over normal growth mistakes is so harsh that further progress is halted.
Jennifer Loudon details all manner of ways for those accustomed to criticism to stop that self abuse and instead to comfort themselves! It takes time to stop saying 'Idiot" when I lose my keys again, and instead take a breath and reassure myself that we'll find them. (I now keep spare keys with a neighbour!"
So often women are either cast in the role of care-giver, or place ourselves in that role; often we either feel guilty taking the time to care for ourselves the way we do our families and friends, or somehow perhaps think we don't deserve it. This simple to use guide helps us first to focus on how we are feeling, getting in touch with what we need. A simple directory of 'situations' gives page numbers for suggested activities. The activities range from the sublime to the ridiculous, but don't laugh at any of them until you have tried them. Just leafing through the book without even doing any of the suggestions seems to help me destress; just the reminder that I can do things to nourish my body and spirit is a wonderful revitalizer. I have given away close to a dozen copies of this book to friends who are used to putting themselves and their needs last on the list of priorities. I can not praise it highly enough for women who can not find time, energy, or inclination to give to themselves the care and love that they give those around them.
I must have given this book half a dozen times as a gift to friends or family members who were in need of a little nurturing, or who needed an excuse to spend a little more time on themselves. This book has dozens of ideas for activities to help you through a day, and even a little categorized index to look for a project based on how you're feeling at the moment. A real treasure! Give it to a loved one by itself, or in combination with a nice journal or blank book and a couple of fun pens (I recommend purple), and she will know you care about her. Better yet, buy one for yourself.
This book helped me through a very difficult time in my life. It offers simple ways to learn to treat yourself well. Often women don't give themselves the time they deserve---this book definitely helps. Every woman should own a copy of this book.
This, the first in a priceless series of books by Jennifer Louden,is truly a "must have" for every woman. The book is full of useable suggestions on how to practice the lost art of self-care,all arranged in an easy to use format. It does take some practice learning to take care of yourself, but this book gives you the permission and the resources to do so.
This book is a keeper for me and my clients. It's another valuable resource for women. Learning how to better nuture yourself is never a waste of time, and this book is a great tool to help guide you along.