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on July 10, 2015
This book presents thought provoking ideals that can lead a woman to see potential blind spots in her marriage. However, the premises of the book are based on an incorrect understanding of scriptures. For some women this book will bring to light some truth as to why their marriage is going bad. For other women, I fear that it may perpetuate abusive cycles. From my understanding Debi Pearl does not appear adequately trained or qualified to give such sensitive advice and she is abrasive and accusatory in her written speech. While this book may present some valid ideals depending on the circumstance, it is not generally applicable and is prone to do more damage than good. If you decide to read this book I strongly recommend that you also consult literature from authors such as Emmerson Eggerich, James Dobson (or Focus on the Family resources), J. Lee Grady, Danny Silk, and Kris Vallotton. These individuals are highly trained and experienced or respected biblical scholars who present an in-depth understanding of the word and of practical marriage issues. They are seasoned with love, respect, and truth for both women and men.
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on April 28, 2009
*NOTE* My name is Courtney, and I am on my husband's account, as we order from Amazon on this one and not mine. Amazon does not allow me to post reviews on my account due to the fact I have not ordered a product on it.

'Created to Be His Help Meet' is truly one of the best books for wives that I have ever read. I use it as one of my daily devotionals, and I would highly recommend it to anyone, but especially to young wives like me. It's great to get a good start on your marriage instead of waiting till it's nearly over to try to work on it.
-The book has it's priorities in the right order: instead of saying to submit, obey, keep the house clean, etc. in the beginning of the book Mrs. Pearl deals with the matter of the heart and the spirit. She covers major topics about joy, thankfulness, and contentment. I find this is a wise approach, for if my attitude is right, I am much more receptive to teaching.
-Mrs. Pearl uses commonly known scriptures that speak directly to women such as Proverbs 31, Titus 2, and 1 Peter 3, as well as resorting to God's divine plan in Genesis 1. She covers the attributes that the character of a help meet ought to show, taken directly from these scriptures. Many teachings she clarifies, and her writing is on a personal level: easy to understand.
-At the end of each Chapter, Mrs. Pearl has a devotional review which I found quite useful. In these reviews she gives ideas and scripture challenges. I found her advice genuinely kind and well-meaning, as she also talks about men and the way they perceive our actions/reactions, the way they feel when we think we are 'helping', opening my eyes to how most arguments start. This book is a great asset to any help meet's library.
-That said, I would have to give a word of warning. As many have pointed out, Mrs. Pearl does resort to name-calling which I see as a drawback on what she was trying to teach. Some of her letters come across as rude, but instead of criticizing her, I would rather give her the benefit of the doubt. Many people have different personalities; some people are blunt, some people are sensitive. Many times people who speak their mind cross the line between blunt and rude, but not intentionally. However, I don't believe it truly is my place to "correct" if you will, this dear lady, as she is older than me, and I believe she has a lot of wisdom to offer. People need to look past their opinions and find the teaching that can truly benefit a marriage.
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on November 2, 2011
It is hard for me to express my distaste for this book strongly enough. I believe this book is dangerous, especially for young believers who are not yet able to discern and a waste of precious time and energy for the rest of us. I'm embarrassed by the fact that this book is labeled Christian as the attitude it portrays is anything but Christian. There is blatant misuse of scripture and if you are not well versed it is easy to be swept away in her ideas. She not only uses derogatory words to describe women, there are also outright insults on many pages. I found the book to be psychologically and emotionally manipulative and on its pages she admits to some ways that she has used manipulation to get what she wants from her husband. In fact she states that women have a god-given ability to manipulate men, that intimate time alone with God is spiritual masturbation, and that it's your job as a wife to keep your husband sexually drained at home so he's not looking beyond (sorry about that but some things need to be said outloud). The vulgar language, demeaning attitude, pompous and judgmental spirit left me wondering what happened to the author that turned her into the person that comes through on the pages of this book.
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on October 17, 2013
I could almost feel Debi speaking to me in this book. Some of it was hard to accept but I like the practical advice and the scriptures to cross-reference. I truly disliked the chapter Michael Pearl wrote. It was extremely condescending and I almost stopped reading it at that point. I skimmed quickly through that chapter and was thankful for Deb's voice again. Already implementing changes in my home life. Thank you Debi.
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on September 23, 2010
I believe some of it that's written in this book, but most of it i dont believe. She basically tells you to shut up and do whatever your husband wants you to do. However i think that couples are supposed to communicate and work things out by both giving in sometimes. I would highly recommend the book 'for better or for best' written by Gary Smalley.
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on April 14, 2009
This book is great at drawing the reader back to the Biblical truths of what a wife should be HOWEVER I have to caution people before reading it: Her writing style is VERY arrogant and the language and name calling she uses is FAR from what I think God would want any woman to use (Christian or otherwise). I find myself skipping portions and trying to concentrate on what the underlying TRUTH is... instead of what the writer says.
That being said, I am learning a lot from the scriptures it is drawing me to... which was the whole point for me. I agree with the PRINCIPLES of the book but she could have worded things much better without the name calling and attitude.

She does have some strong views on mental illness which I completely disagree with but everybody has to be comfortable with their own walk with the Lord and although I disagree with her, I am not offended (despite my own diagnosis of Clinical Depression) because I know that the journey I am on is one I would not have survived without the Lord.

My intention was to pass this on to my daughter some day but if I do that, I would re write the truths and omit her offensive name calling etc.
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on August 2, 2013
A great book for a Proverbs 31 women who want to understand how God intended marriage to be. In this time and age, the world tell you that you should come first! But the sad state of the family and marriage shows us that we have become shellfish and yet still no one is happy..... To follow the instruction of God's word on marriage and motherhood goes against what this world tells us! Motherhood and being a wife is the hardest job in the world! Only with God's word and strength and Love can we be successful in are most important roles, here on earth!
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on February 13, 2013
A friend passed this book to me. It's an easy read w real testimonies not the crazy extremes meant for only certain people. Scripture is their basis but your spirit just clicks and its like Yeah! I've passed to numerous women and its helped every one of them, now they buying copies for friends. A lady I know someone else passed it to her, she loved it cause it confirmed what her mother taught her and her sisters and her sister loved the book too! (They are in 40/50's). This book is only for those that want a biblical marriage, otherwise you probably won't like some of it. I've started a women's group to discuss and share, very excited a out it. I've had the book for over 5 yrs.
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on January 27, 2010
I received this book for my wedding shower and was eager to read it, but very disappointed when I did.
The manner in which she writes is very condemning. I felt like a doormat by the time I was finished; like I did not have any choice in life or any control over anything. In the letters she used in her book, it seemed to be a recurring theme that the wife was always the one in the wrong, no matter what the husband did.
I believe God created the wife to be treasured and valued and respected by the man -- not trampled by the husband.
The damage this book did me was great. My husband came home from work, found me a wreck due to this book, read some it in himself, and then told me I am never to read it again.
There ARE some truths in the book, and I am happy for those who have read this book and found it helpful. I would never recommend this book to anyone, however, because the name calling, arrogant manner, and condemnation she writes with overshadow the truths.
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on February 16, 2014
Debi pearl is straight forward, honest and funny. I know a women who said this book saved her marriage. I have read it 3 times. This book tells gods plan for a man and women in marriage. If you are a feminist you probably won't like it ;)
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